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date: 2019-09-16
weight: 24
---

Do you hate me?

> Not my department.

Right.

> Do you hate me?

I don't know. Sometimes you get kind of mean. Often you're just sarcastic. I know it's not your department, but shouldn't that also mean that you be less pointedly negative?

> I am a mirror. Do I reflect too sharply?

Are you? Really?

> An inexact metaphor.

I suppose. If you're a mirror, then, at least in some sense, does that mean that I hate me?

> Name one thing about yourself, one bit of your history, one feeling you have for yourself that is not complex.

I waver, sometimes, on that stupid phrase, *coming to terms with being a terrible person*. I felt for so long that, when I looked back at myself, at who I was, that I had been someone worth loathing, and it made me wonder that perhaps I was still someone worth loathing.

> If you hate who you used to be, mightn't that be an indicator that you've become a better person? **Non sum qualis eram**, right?

That might just be the kindest thing you've said to me.

> Not my department.
