update from sparkleup

writing/post-self/mitzvot/004.md

@@ -2,7 +2,7 @@
 
 Ioan half lay, half slouched against the headboard with May draped bonelessly up along eir front. She'd gotten up to make them both coffee to drink in bed, then proceeded to doze off again, using eir chest as a pillow and the rest of em as a mattress.
 
-Ey, meanwhile, had made it through most of eir coffee, resting the cup between the skunk's shoulder blades between sips. It was technically Christmas, and while neither of them cared much for the holiday --- Michelle Hadje had been raised Jewish and the B that did mean it was the day for the *tocană* and *mămăligă* that had become tradition for them. Ey hadn't learned to cook much prior to uploading --- just a few simple dishes for a poor student --- and it wasn't until ey had wound up on the System in eir current sim that ey'd gone back to teach emself all the things ey'd loved growing up.
+Ey, meanwhile, had made it through most of eir coffee, resting the cup between the skunk's shoulder blades between sips. It was technically Christmas, and while neither of them cared much for the holiday --- Michelle Hadje had been raised Jewish and the Bălans had all but ignored the holiday that so pervaded western culture --- that did mean it was the day for the *tocană* and *mămăligă* that had become tradition for them. Ey hadn't learned to cook much prior to uploading --- just a few simple dishes for a poor student --- and it wasn't until ey had wound up on the System in eir current sim that ey'd gone back to teach emself all the things ey'd loved growing up.
 
 It promised to be a lazy sort of day otherwise, which felt necessary. May's spike of anxiety when ey'd gone out for eir meeting with True Name a few days prior had quickly tapered off, but it had not simply gone away. The days that followed had included a lot of asking em if ey was okay and taking breaks to sit and look out the picture windows, lost in thought.
 

writing/post-self/mitzvot/007.md

@@ -94,7 +94,7 @@ She bounced on the balls of her feet and nodded. "Yes! You, my dear, know just h
 
 One of the things that Ioan appreciated most about J2 over all of the other sushi places May had dragged em to is that it was the most amenable to em eating with eir hands. May was quite nimble with chopsticks --- no mean feat with paws and claws --- but ey'd never quite picked it up, so being able to eat those little bullets of rice and fish with eir hands suited em quite well.
 
-It had a channel of water floating along between the booths, small dishes drifting by lazily for the diners to pluck from the water. This obviated the need for any staff, real or simulated, as each dish would be replaced from behind a bend in the river. With no need to pay beyond a token amount of reputation, it simply became a pleasant evening out, plates stacking up at the edge of their table, a tacit contest with other diners.
+It had a channel of water floating along between the booths, small dishes drifting by lazily for the diners to pluck from the water. This obviated the need for any staff, real or simulated, as each dish would be replaced from behind a bend in the river. With no need to pay beyond a token amount of reputation, it simply became a pleasant evening out, plates stacking up at the edge of their table a tacit contest with other diners.
 
 "Did you get what you needed out of your walk earlier?" May asked before popping a bit of fish into her muzzle.
 
@@ -112,7 +112,7 @@ Ey shrugged, finished chewing, and said, "I guess. Was doing some thinking into
 
 "Well, all the same, it's not like it's comfortable. I don't think anyone likes feeling helpless, but I just wish I didn't get hung up on finding solutions to everything."
 
-"You know, it is weird," she said, jabbing a shrimp at em. "For someone who spent so long purely observing, a busybody tendency feels out of place."
+"You know, it is weird," she said, gesturing vaguely with a shrimp. "For someone who spent so long purely observing, a busybody tendency feels out of place."
 
 Ey shook eir head. "Observing is situational. If there's something happening that has a start and end, or which I can come home from, then I can just observe it. If it's something that's ongoing or integral to a person, especially a meaningful person, then I feel like I really want to help."
 

writing/post-self/mitzvot/008.md

@@ -56,7 +56,7 @@ Forcing emself to concentrate on eir writing at least bought em ten minutes of w
 
 "Huh," True Name mumbled, frowning.
 
-"Mm?"
+"Hmm?"
 
 She shook her head. "Nothing, I suppose. Just got a merge from an instance, and it sounds like Jonas is looking for me. He knows that I am--"
 
@@ -106,9 +106,9 @@ The other skunk had shifted from her near feral crouch to standing, rigid and st
 
 When she didn't answer, May began pacing and muttering --- whether to herself or through some sensorium message, ey couldn't tell.
 
-Guōweī.
+Guōweī. The assassin. The reputation analyst who had killed Qoheleth in the middle of his speech.
 
-The assassin. The reputation analyst who had killed Qoheleth in the middle of his speech. A quick prowl through eir memories lined up face with name.
+A quick prowl through eir memories lined up face with name.
 
 Eventually, True Name's shoulders sagged and she stumbled down from the trees, Ioan and May both watching her, wide-eyed. She kept walking past them, past the trail, down onto muddy beach, then out into the water. The short waves lapped up against her legs, soaking her slacks, and still she kept walking. She walked until the lake had made its way nearly up to her waist.
 

writing/post-self/mitzvot/009.md

@@ -6,7 +6,7 @@ True Name, having gathered her wits about her at least enough to trudge out of t
 
 She bowed to em and May then trudged off down the path.
 
-May glared after her down-tree instance with her paws bunched into fists and ears splayed, then whirled on Ioan, waving a cone of silence into being.
+May glared after her down-tree instance with her paws bunched into fists and ears canted back, then whirled on Ioan, waving a cone of silence into being.
 
 "Ioan, I am not at all happy," she said, voice frigid. "I know that none of this is your fault except inasmuch as you have been meeting her for coffee, but I am having a hard time keeping my anger to myself."
 

writing/post-self/mitzvot/012.md

@@ -30,7 +30,7 @@ May flopped down onto her usual beanbag and rubbed her paws over her face while
 
 Ioan nodded, finishing up the coffee prep --- eirs black and both of the skunks' sweet and creamy --- and carrying the mugs to each of them. "I guessed," ey said, setting one down in front of True Name. "Let me know if you need anything different."
 
-Ey sat down carefully by May and held both of their coffees while the skunk scooted in close against em as usual before handing hers over. It felt good to be back in a more comfortable setting, back where May and em could could at least get close, even if everything still felt nerve-wracking. 
+Ey sat down carefully by May and held both of their coffees while the skunk scooted in close against em as usual before handing hers over. It felt good to be back in a more comfortable setting, back where ey and May could could at least get close, even if everything still felt nerve-wracking. 
 
 They drank in silence for a while, minus a thank you from each of the skunks, the three of them doing their best to un-cringe from last day's worth of anxiety.