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update from sparkleup

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Madison Rye Progress 2024-10-28 22:06:08 -07:00
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writing/post-self/what-right-have-I/001.md
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@ -46,5 +46,15 @@ And that is, apparently, a fidgety, anxious mess who is doing her best not to sc
I am wandering.
<!-- Barukh ata Adonai Eloheinu, melekh ha'olam, hagomel lahayavim tovot, sheg'molani kol tov. -->
"–know that the Century Attack was a deliberate effort, it is easy for us to reach to parallels in the past." Rav From Whence is saying. "Death on such a scale is hard to imagine, as is loss of such magnitude, but we must remember that, until one year ago today, never before had such recovery of life been accomplished. We mourn our 23 billion dead, we celebrate the 2.3 trillion who are still alive. What Right Have I?"
I tug my tunic straight and step forward to stand beside Rav From Whence. Then tug my tunic straight again, scrub my paws down over my sides, and tug my tunic straight once more.
It is worth mentioning that it is not the crowds that make me nervous. Yes, I have certainly never spoken to an audience of *thousands* before, just as I have never had my words broadcast over AVEC so that those back phys-side can watch, can hear my stammering voice, but I do not feel fear of audiences, of public speaking.
Instead, I feel fear of myself, of so many intrusive thoughts.
*"Baruch ata Adonai Eloheinu, melekh ha'olam, hagomel lahayavim tovot, sheg'molani kol tov,"* I call out.
The response comes from only a quarter of the assembled — a mumbled, *"Amen. Mi sheg'malcha kol tov, hu yigmolchem kol tov selah,"* that I cannot help but sound out in my head in time — but it is enough to show that I am not speaking solely to politicians and bureaucrats (or whatever passes for such, sys-side)