update from sparkleup

writing/post-self/neviim/index.md

@@ -47,6 +47,7 @@ Prophet aspect: Artemisians have been at this longer, start giving advice, etc,
     * [ ] Maybe Tycho dies, or invests entire in the remote ship, then gets the Sarah Williams quote read at memorial?
     * [ ] Codrin struggles with feeling completely reactive and unable to be proactive. It's not that ey doesn't want to take on the project, but ey feels obligated to; it's not that ey can't decide whether or not to join the Artemis, but that ey can't do so unless Dear and its partner do so first. Eir character arc is that ey gets over that.
     * [ ] Artemisians don't have forking (except for very special cases like representatives), but have time management and reproduction (even between species)
+    * [ ] From Toledot: Time Is A Finger Pointing At Itself stanza is the one that got Ioan and May into theatre
 * [ ] Conflict notes:
     * [ ] Should stay away from humans are special thing a la Anathem
     * [ ] Maybe less political machinations, more figuring each other out a la Axiom's End

writing/post-self/toledot/launch/sys/Ioan/012.md

@@ -30,21 +30,21 @@ She nodded, stayed silent.
 
 Ey nodded. "For that, sure, but also for the sake of me, or us."
 
-"It is nothing terribly dramatic," she admitted. "Though I knew that you would not learn about it until after you learned about everything else. That was my worry." There was a long pause before she asked, "Do you know what each of the stanzas did?"
+"It is nothing terribly dramatic, taken on its own," she admitted. "Though I knew that you would not learn about it until after you learned about everything else and in context, I...well. That was my worry." There was a long pause before she asked, "Do you know what each of the stanzas did?"
 
 "No, I don't think so. Or, maybe I know a few, but if it helps, you can tell me about the rest."
 
-"Alright," she said. "The ones I think you know are Praiseworthy, who loosely focused on propaganda and shaping sentiment; Qoheleth, who focused on shaping history; and True Name, who focused on political manipulation. Hammered Silver was written off by those three, because she was all that was motherly in Michelle. She wanted to take care of her, and, after a while, they were too cynical to think it worthwhile.
+"Alright," she said. "The ones I think you know are Praiseworthy, who loosely focused on propaganda and shaping sentiment; Qoheleth, who focused on shaping history; and True Name, who focused on political manipulation. Hammered Silver was written off by those three, because she was all that was motherly in Michelle. She wanted to take care of her, and, after a while, they were too cynical to think it worthwhile. I think I understand her stanza better than my own.
 
-"I Am At A Loss For Images In This End Of Days focused on observing. Initially, this was borne out of watching and critiquing performances, but quickly grew to spying.
+"I Am At A Loss For Images In This End Of Days focused on observing. Initially, this was borne out of watching and critiquing performances, but quickly grew to spying. Some of her stanza doubtless watches us still.
 
-"Oh, But To Whom Do I Speak These Words kept an eye on religions. Her stanza focused on both phys- and sys-side religions as areas of interest.
+"Oh, But To Whom Do I Speak These Words kept an eye on religions. Her stanza focused on both phys- and sys-side religions as areas of interest. We have not had much to talk about through the years.
 
 "Among Those Who Create Are Those Who Forge started out by watching creatives here on the System, perhaps unsurprisingly, but grew bored and wandered off to do their own thing.
 
-"Time Is A Finger Pointed At Itself helped both Praiseworthy and Qoheleth as a speech writer, though she was more into theatre than whatever work they gave her.
+"Time Is A Finger Pointed At Itself helped both Praiseworthy and Qoheleth as a speech writer, though she was more into theatre than whatever work they gave her. I must take you to one of her shows.
 
-"If I Am To Bathe In Dreams acted as the grounding element for much of the clade. She became something of a therapist.
+"If I Am To Bathe In Dreams acted as the grounding element for much of the clade. She became something of a therapist. I have leaned on her often.
 
 "May One Day Death Itself Not Die forked off all ten instances as soon as she could and then refused to fork again. I think she was left with much of that disconnect from reality that Michelle felt."
 
@@ -52,7 +52,7 @@ Ey nodded. "For that, sure, but also for the sake of me, or us."
 
 "Because I need you to understand that the first lines each wound up with a bit of Michelle, and from there, their forks were all riffs on that theme. You have doubtless figured that out by now. I told you early on that True Name forked me off to feel, but she did so in the most True Name way possible. She wanted to ensure that she also had a way to sway individuals, sys-side, as others focused on large groups.
 
-"So she forked to create me, and then we discussed how best to accomplish that, and through the various mutation algos that go along with forking, I softened my appearance to be cuter and rounder, softened my voice, learned how to smile more earnestly, and did all the things I could think of to make myself as appealing as possible, whether as human or skunk."
+"So she forked to create me, and then we discussed how best to accomplish that, and through the various mutation algos, I softened my appearance to be cuter and rounder, softened my voice, learned how to smile more earnestly, and did all the things I could think of to make myself as appealing as possible, whether as human or skunk."
 
 Ey frowned. "That doesn't sound like feeling."