From 8fcf6491c9d1c1f508a0ecc6d08fde078e16740e Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: Madison Scott-Clary Date: Wed, 23 Aug 2023 17:05:06 -0700 Subject: [PATCH] update from sparkleup --- writing/3/unknown-things/iyov/index.md | 2 +- writing/3/unknown-things/iyov/reverse/choice.md | 7 +++++-- 2 files changed, 6 insertions(+), 3 deletions(-) diff --git a/writing/3/unknown-things/iyov/index.md b/writing/3/unknown-things/iyov/index.md index 5b7cc240..2101955c 100644 --- a/writing/3/unknown-things/iyov/index.md +++ b/writing/3/unknown-things/iyov/index.md @@ -25,7 +25,7 @@ Timeboxed third attempt for academic in footnotes: * [.] [Younes](reverse/younes) --- Gender play and hidden selves * [ ] [Dysphoria](reverse/dysphoria) --- The internal side * [ ] [Clash with Jill](reverse/clash) --- Stopped talking, told off for Younes, told to fuck off -* [ ] [The choice of Job](reverse/choice) +* [.] [The choice of Job](reverse/choice) [Workshop notes](workshop-notes) diff --git a/writing/3/unknown-things/iyov/reverse/choice.md b/writing/3/unknown-things/iyov/reverse/choice.md index 6e55c2ea..4213e15b 100644 --- a/writing/3/unknown-things/iyov/reverse/choice.md +++ b/writing/3/unknown-things/iyov/reverse/choice.md @@ -4,7 +4,11 @@ There is a point of least faith. This is the minimum amount of faith required to > But what does it mean to believe in something like [the irreversibility of time]? Or the sanctity of life or love or art? Or God, for that matter? 'Belief' as a word is a stand-in for a concept so broad as to be to be intimidating or impossible. One may say as Blake did, "For everything that lives is holy", but encompassing that within one's mind is truly terrifying. \parencite[122]{mitzvot} -This point implies for some an ideal of least faith: that one should strive to live their life taking the least number of things on faith as possible, that to rely too much on faith becomes a fault. For others, it is a principle of least faith: it is an intrinsic property that we tend towards the least amount of faith required to live, as is evidenced by the ever-increasing understanding of the world around ourselves. +All of those things in which we have faith, whether it's, as True Name says above, the sanctity of life or love or art, or perhaps God, circle around the unknown. The are perhaps too hot to touch directly, so we define them apophatically. We circle around them along with these simple words --- life, love, art, God --- and hope that we can divine their shape by the shadow of our passage. We circle and circle and circle, and our wandering steps wear down the earth beneath our feet until that which we explore is left on higher land. The elevation of unknown things is a constant and collective process. + +I'm Madison now. I'm no closer to defining what it means to be transgender. Were I pressed to describe what it feels like, I may have the words --- it feels like an oscillation between dys- and euphoria as I move further away and closer to this sense of identity --- but I don't have the connection to those words that makes them feel *real,* feel *true.* + +This point of least faith implies for some an *ideal* of least faith: that one should strive to live their life taking the least number of things on faith as possible, that to rely too much on faith becomes a fault. For others, it is a principle of least faith: it is an intrinsic property that we tend towards the least amount of faith required to live, as is evidenced by the ever-increasing understanding of the world around ourselves. And, perhaps because of that principle, this point of least faith is always shifting, trending usually downwards --- though some discoveries, if they are to be believed, may make that line tick upwards. Every day, we drift towards some point at which all things may be known. @@ -22,4 +26,3 @@ But I would have at least done it. I was young, once, and dumb. I can hardly say I'm any smarter, now, but at least I'm Madison. At least I'm not that angsty, angry asshole who thought to himself he needed to come to terms with being a terrible person. -All of those things in which we have faith, whether it's, as True Name says above, the sanctity of life or love or art, or perhaps God, circle around the unknown.