update from sparkleup

writing/post-self/neviim/local/tycho/016.md

@@ -1,10 +1,10 @@
 # Tycho Brahe --- 2346
 
-"I don't own a suit, and while I could have picked one up, it seemed like too much work for the occasion," Tycho said once the clock struck eight and he'd stood at the head of the table. "So the usual jeans and flannel it is."
+"I don't own a suit, and while I could have picked one up, it seemed like too much work for the occasion," Tycho said once the clock struck eight and he'd stood from his seat at the head of the table. "So the usual jeans and flannel it is."
 
 Those gathered laughed.
 
-They'd claimed the plaza for his last dinner, setting up a long table not too dissimilar from that which they'd sat at for the conference. He had sat at one end, and at the other True Name sat, smiling and watching him rise for his speech. To his right sat Codrin and eir two partners, both of whom had spent much of the evening conversing with each other and the few scientists who sat to his left. He'd not missed the fact that they seemed to be ignoring the other three Odists as best they could other than to accept praise for the food.
+They'd claimed a portion of the plaza for his last dinner, setting up a long table not too dissimilar from that which they'd sat at for the conference. He had sat at one end, and at the other True Name sat, smiling and watching him rise for his speech. To his right sat Codrin and eir two partners, both of whom had spent much of the evening conversing with each other and the few scientists who sat to his left. He'd not missed the fact that they seemed to be ignoring the other three Odists as best they could other than to accept praise for the food they'd cooked for the occasion.
 
 Those scientists included Dr. Verda and several of his other colleagues who had served as on-duty astronomer for Castor throughout the long years.
 
@@ -14,13 +14,13 @@ Beyond them, Sovanna sat across from Answers Will Not Help --- a move that surel
 
 The dinner had been his idea, and the speech True Name's. He'd balked at it originally, but in the end, she'd won out, convincing him that if he was headed to a place where he could forget, making his last moments on Castor memorable should be a priority.
 
-Luckily, for all his nerves, he'd always done okay giving talks at conferences, and the two glasses of wine he'd already had certainly helped.
+Luckily, for all his nerves, he'd always done well at giving talks at conferences, and the two glasses of wine he'd already had certainly helped.
 
-"When it was suggested that I give a little speech before I go, I'd been at a loss for what to talk about. I mean, I guess I could talk about the stars or something, but I've bored enough of you to death already with that, and Stolon and I will have time enough on Artemis."
+"When it was suggested that I give a little speech before I go, I was at a loss for what to talk about. I mean, I guess I could talk about the stars or something, but I've bored enough of you to death already with that, and Stolon and I will have time enough on Artemis."
 
 The thirdracer chattered their teeth, looking pleased.
 
-"It wasn't until I realized that this would be something of a eulogy that I started getting ideas on what to talk about. I talked with Dear about it and it laughed and told me about some thoughts that it had around Launch. I didn't know any of them, but apparently it and its partners had a Death Day party, and that's kind of what this is, isn't it? I'm kind of dying to many of you, only to haunt you from beyond the grave with vague pronouncements about the heavens for a little while.
+"It wasn't until I realized that this would be something of a eulogy that I started getting ideas on what to talk about. I talked with Dear about it and it laughed and told me about some thoughts that it had around Launch. I didn't know any of them then, but apparently it and its partners had a Death Day party, and that's kind of what this is, isn't it? I'm dying to many of you, only to haunt you from beyond the grave with vague pronouncements about the heavens for a little while.
 
 "Once I started thinking of it that way, I was able to come up with some better words for tonight, some of which I'll blame True Name for."
 
@@ -28,25 +28,27 @@ The skunk raised her glass to him.
 
 "When we first heard from the Artemisians, True Name met me at my sim and quoted a snippet of poetry by Sarah Williams to me: reach me down my Tycho Brahe,---I would know him when we meet, When I share my later science, sitting humbly at his feet; He may know the law of all things, yet be ignorant of how We are working to completion, working on from then till now.
 
-"See, Tycho Brahe is a name I picked for myself forty years ago when Codrin interviewed me for the *History*. Brahe was an astronomer who was born eight hundred years ago this year. A lot of his science was bunk, but that's what the poem says, isn't it? He may know the law of all things, but we're the ones with the later science.
+"See, Tycho Brahe is a name I picked for myself twenty years ago when Codrin interviewed me for the *History*. Brahe was an astronomer who was born eight hundred years ago this year. A lot of his science was bunk, but that's what the poem says, isn't it? He may know the law of all things, but we're the ones with the later science.
 
 "That stanza was quoted to me as a way of suggesting that we will learn from the later science of the Artemisians, and perhaps we'll have something to teach them as well, but also, as True Name noted, it's a poem about death, telling the final words of an astronomer to his pupil."
 
-The mood had settled into somber, present, and while eyes were dry, he could tell there was still sadness in there.
+The mood had settled into somber, present, and while most eyes were dry, he could tell there was still sadness in there.
 
 "I won't quote the whole thing, since it's quite long, but there's a few bits that I'd like to share with you before I leave.
 
 "There has been a something wanting in my nature until now; I can dimly comprehend it,---that I might have been more kind, Might have cherished you more wisely, as the one I leave behind.
 
-"Perhaps I should have cherished you all more while I was here. I really don't know. It's not in my habit to cherish people, for better or worse, but maybe I should have cherished my time here on Castor, or even back on Legrange, more than I did. It was still home, wasn't it? I lived here. I loved what I did. "What, for us," Williams writes. "Are all distractions of men's fellowship and smiles? What, for us, the goddess Pleasure, with her meretricious wiles?" Pleasure came second, and the fallout of that is what I was fundamentally unhappy, and thus perhaps unable to cherish.
+"Perhaps I should have cherished you all more while I was here. I really don't know. It's not in my nature to cherish people, for better or worse, but maybe I should have cherished my time here on Castor, or even back on Legrange, more than I did. It was still home, wasn't it? I lived here. I loved what I did. "What, for us," Williams writes. "Are all distractions of men's fellowship and smiles? What, for us, the goddess Pleasure, with her meretricious wiles?" Pleasure came second, and the fallout of that is what I was fundamentally unhappy, and thus perhaps unable to cherish.
 
 "That's not to say that I won't miss you all. Some of you are up on Artemis already, and some more may join in these last few days before the Ansible shuts down, but no matter what, I *will* miss you all.
 
-"It's just that, as the poem says, "I have sown, like Tycho Brahe, that a greater man may reap; But if none should do my reaping, 'twill disturb me in my sleep." I'm headed off to newer places, to learn the later sciences at the feet of those who have been traveling for so long. I've done my work, though I've left it incomplete. Many of you will have much to work on to complete it. In fact, I think the only thing I'm leaving behind that is well and truly finished to my liking is my sim, and even then, it sounds like perisystem engineers are working on getting visual transmission piped in."
+"It's just that, as the poem says, "I have sown, like Tycho Brahe, that a greater man may reap; But if none should do my reaping, 'twill disturb me in my sleep." I'm headed off to newer places, to learn the later sciences at the feet of those who have been traveling for so long. I've done my work, though I've left it incomplete. Many of you will have much to work on to complete it. You must!
 
-There were some smiles around the table, but no laughter. All were focused entirely on him, and he had to force down a wave of embarrassment at his poor speech.
+"In fact, I think the only thing I'm leaving behind that is well and truly finished to my liking is my sim, and even then, it sounds like perisystem engineers are working on getting visual transmission piped in."
 
-"I only have one more snippet of poetry to leave you with, and it will be my goodbye. It'll be the last thing I say on Castor, and trust me when I say that those words made me dizzy the first time I thought of them. I'll cease being here. I'll cease being among a place that is all --- or, now, a majority --- my own species. I'll cease being on anything made around our own dear Sun.
+There were some smiles around the table, but no laughter. All were focused entirely on him, and he had to force down a wave of embarrassment at his speech.
+
+"I only have one more snippet of poetry to leave you with, and it will be my goodbye. It'll be the last thing I say on Castor, and trust me when I say that those words made me dizzy the first time I thought of them. 'Last thing I say on Castor'. I'll cease being here. I'll cease being among a place that is all --- or, now, a majority --- my own species. I'll cease being on anything made around our own dear Sun.
 
 "I could draw out such a goodbye, but I won't. Not more than I already have. You'll have your memories, won't you?"
 
@@ -56,17 +58,19 @@ Perhaps they said goodbye to him, calling out. Perhaps some of them did cry, as
 
 He didn't know. 
 
-Before he could look, before he could listen, he set his glass down, turned on his heel and walked straight to the customs building.
+Before he could look, before he could listen, he set his glass down, turned on his heel and walked straight into the customs building.
 
-Within, there was a small pedestal that bore a plaque he'd read countless times by now: *Place your hand on the pedestal below and hold it there for ten seconds. This is a transfer process of the current instance, so please be sure to leave a fork behind.*
+Within, there was a small pedestal that bore a plaque he'd read countless times by now: *Place your hand on the pedestal below and hold it there for ten seconds. This is a **transfer process** of the current instance, so please be sure to leave a fork behind.*
 
 He did not leave a fork behind. He simply closed his eyes, put his hand on the pedestal, and waited.
 
-There it was. There was that slippery feeling to time. There was that change in atmosphere, that change in pressure, that change in ACLs. There was that change in the way the very fabric of the world was woven.
+There it was.
+
+There was that slippery feeling to time. There was that change in atmosphere, that change in pressure, that change in ACLs. There was that change in the way the very fabric of the world was woven.
 
 There, too, was Stolon standing just outside the gazebo that served as the arrival point from Castor.
 
-He stepped out into the cool night, and, as he had slowly grown used to, let Stolon butt their head against his arm in a friendly greeting. He couldn't do the same, given the height difference, so he'd taken to bumping a fist against the thirdracer's shoulder.
+He stepped out into the cool night, and, as he had slowly grown used to, let Stolon butt their head against his arm in a friendly greeting. He couldn't do the same, given the height difference, so he'd taken to bumping a fist against the thirdracer's shoulder in response.
 
 "*Nahi,* Tycho."
 
@@ -74,6 +78,8 @@ He stepped out into the cool night, and, as he had slowly grown used to, let Sto
 
 "It is done, *anem?* It is finished?"
 
-He nodded and smiled. An earnest smile. A true smile. He'd finally done it. He'd finally done *something.* This future was his. His to make of it what he would.
+He nodded and smiled. An earnest smile. A true smile.
+
+He'd finally done it. He'd finally done *something.* This future was his. His to make of it what he would.
 
 "*Anem.* It is finished."