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update from sparkleup

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Madison Scott-Clary 2022-07-17 19:30:06 -05:00
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writing/post-self/mitzvot/002.md
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@ -6,7 +6,7 @@
"And to be built to love is to be all edges. They catch on your clothes, they brush against walls and furniture. You are all edges so that love can fill the cracks and soften those jagged corners.
"You are spiked and barbed. You are almost built that way on purpose, so that the slightest breeze can blow you about and catch you up on some future love."
"You are spiked and barbed. It is as if you are built that way on purpose, so that the slightest breeze can blow you about and catch you up on some future love."
The skunk had been sitting on a barstool, hunched over a pint and slurring half to the glass, half to some absent bartender. She slid to her feet, wobbled for a moment, then righted herself.
@ -30,13 +30,13 @@ Ey slouched back against the front row seat ey'd claimed, tapping the end of eir
"So no 'I deserved that one'?"
She walked to the edge of the stage and sat on it, kicking her feet idly. "It was not in there, no, but I think I will keep it."
She sat down on the edge of the stage, kicking her feet idly. "It was not in there, no, but I think I will keep it."
Ey grinned and closed eir notebook around eir pen, setting it aside to stand. "Yeah, it's good in there," ey said, leaning forward to give the bridge of the skunk's snout a kiss. May squinted her eyes shut and then scrubbed a paw over her muzzle. "I mean, the whole thing's good. Only note I really had is that you say 'hate' four times in a pretty short span right after you stood up. 'That to hate', then 'truly hate', then 'object of your hatred', and then 'little bit of hatred'."
"Should I make them all different?"
"I'd keep the first two because it works as an echo, so maybe just change the third?"
"I'd keep the first two because it works as an echo, so maybe just change the fourth? 'Loathing'?"
"Excellent, O great wordsmith."