update from sparkleup

writing/post-self/selected-letters/013.md

@@ -27,7 +27,34 @@ I'm told that we'll soon get inter-System A/V transmissions, though it'll be res
 
 There have been a few bumps as we sort things out. Obviously, we still occasionally wind up feeling low from █████'s absence. There's been a few days where one or the other of us winds up in a sulk, though we're increasingly getting used to this new life.
 
-Dear and Serene have also wound up in feedback loops a few times. Remember when I wrote "
-(Dear and Serene feedback loop)
+Dear and Serene have also wound up in feedback loops a few times. Remember when I wrote "Two foxes in the same house? Never again"? Well, I still have my occasional moments of regret. One of them will get a little extra sarcastic and the other will try to one-up them. Or, worse, one will get a little snippy, and it'll turn into a quick volley of shitty comments followed by a sulk, then back to as it was before.[^asitwas] When this happens, either I'll step out, or I'll kick them both out to deal with it. It's been a quick adjustment, honestly; far easier than when █████ was here. Maybe just because there are fewer different interpersonal dynamics at play? I'm still thinking about it.
 
-(seeing █████ once or twice)
+I have seen █████ a few times, for what it's worth. It's not like they just up and cut contact. We've gotten coffee a few times, and they've stopped by for a largely failed dinner party. While we have largely worked out that things are just kind of over between us than them, that doesn't mean that our feelings have just dissipated --- nor, indeed, have theirs: "It's still a break-up, I'm still hurting over it, even if it's for the best."
+
+And you know, as I take a look back at who we were, at who Codrin#Castor is and, hell, who you and Aurel are, I see where they're coming from. We can't stay the same forever. Our happinesses change as the world around us changes. We can't possibly remain the same, but neither can we possibly change in exactly the same ways. Something like this was bound to happen, and it has me thinking that there will probably come a day when Dear and I drift apart. I don't know if that'll be any easier for being the second time around, or just differently hard, but I suppose one upside of the whole thing is that it has me focusing on the love I have in front of me.
+
+Speaking of the love in front of us! Aurel and Sasha? What a delight! At first, I was surprised that it took as long as it did, but then I realized that Sasha's far more complex than just "May Then My Name plus two friends". Then I was surprised that Ioan and May Then My Name's relationship didn't just expand to include her, but of course not everyone's relationship structure need mirror ours (never mind the fact that I don't even know what the dynamic is between May Then My Name and Sasha; it sounds friendly enough, at least).
+
+**Ioan eyes-only**
+
+If I may ask, how has the dynamic worked when you're away from May Then My Name but still with Sasha when you're Aurel? I can't imagine it's entirely comfortable to spend much time with her, even if you're still with someone you love. You live in the same building,[^building] if I'm picturing this right, but I'm assuming you're hardly seeing your other partner all of the time, right?
+
+I guess I ask because there's at least a small analogy to be made between our two situations, in that I'm no longer with █████ but still with Dear. I know --- or at least suspect --- that it's not exactly the same, as Aurel's still a fork, however long-lived, and thus not *not* in a relationship with May Then My Name, just that that's on pause.
+
+It's just that, if I'm to keep seeing █████ on occasion, I'm going to have to figure out how to interact in a way that isn't strictly in a relationship, yet also isn't as fragile as I feel.
+
+All the same, I wish the three/four/six/seven/however-you-count-it of you the best.
+
+Also, some of your letters are starting to sound a little despondent when it comes to Rareș. Are you okay? Is there anything we can help with? I...will admit that I know a bit more about the current status,[^library] but I'm not going to dump that on you without your permission.
+
+**End**
+
+All my love. Dear and Serene both send theirs as well.
+
+Codrin Bălan#Pollux
+
+[^asitwas]: I don't mean "pretending it didn't happen", mind. They seem to accept these little spats as part of cohabitation. They take them seriously, address the issue, but then just get on with life. It's taken a bit of getting used to, as it's different from how Dear interacts with me. I haven't figured it out at all, but I guess when you have a fight with yourself, you get over it far quicker.
+
+[^building]: I'm trying to picture this: it goes your and May Then My Name's bedroom, the den/kitchen, then a door to Aurel and Sasha's bedroom, then their own den/kitchen? Like a duplex? Do you use that door oven? Do you see each other out on the deck? Eat together? I'm hungry for details.
+
+[^library]: It comes with working in a library.