zk_html/diary/2012-08-26-21:23:16.html

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                <h1>Zk | 2012-08-26 21:23:16</h1>
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                <p><span class="tag">blog</span> <span class="tag">fossil</span> <span class="tag">diary</span></p>
<p>It&rsquo;s a little strange how, even in so technological an age, we can still come back to the yearly cycle for metaphor and feel comfortable.</p>
<p>Five months ago, on March 21, I had the worst night of my life, period, <em>ever</em>, and tomorrow marks five months to the day when I returned back to work for the first time after that. That makes it May 5 in this new springtime.</p>
<p>And unlike the previous springtime of adolescence, this is a springtime of unknowing. Before, I always knew what would come next. Elementary to middle to high school, and college afterward. College to a job to retirement. Buy a house, get a dog, get married. But now, I don&rsquo;t know when summer comes, I don&rsquo;t know when the year ends.</p>
<p>Two weeks ago, I gave a presentation in front of a standing room only audience on data visualization and the furry fandom.</p>
<p>A week and a half ago, I resigned from my job as project lead to accept a position at Canonical as a developer.</p>
<p>A week ago, I began tapering off the last of my medications, and picked up a nervous tic from it.</p>
<p>Friday, I received a call telling me it was okay to stop that medication flat out.</p>
<p>Yesterday I painted my toenails with James for No Reason At All.</p>
<p>Four hours ago, I experienced hypnotism for the first time, and the imagery of springtime was cemented in place. I haven&rsquo;t been this relaxed (even with the tic) since the summer of the previous cycle.</p>
<p>There are things embedded in the western doxa which will make this all sound so trite to just about every one of you, but folks, life is so bigÂ and <em>so wonderful,</em>Â the high points so exalted and the low points so profound, that there is honestly no better reason to go on living than life itself.</p>
<p>Have at it.</p>
<p>All my love,</p>
<p>~M</p>
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