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<h1>Zk | *babble*</h1>
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<p><span class="tag">diary</span> <span class="tag">livejournal</span> <span class="tag">fossils</span></p>
2020-06-24 07:10:07 +00:00
<p>So I&rsquo;m not quite sure what happened last night, but I&rsquo;m reasonably sure it wasn&rsquo;t sleep. I took a shower at about 1 because I was feeling wired and hoped that it&rsquo;d calm me down. It felt a little like it did, but after just laying there for three hours worrying and thinking my usual stupid thoughts (I get on these &lsquo;what if&rsquo; trains that don&rsquo;t seem very bad at the time, but then I think back on them and I sound like I&rsquo;m terribly depressed, plus some delusions of grandeur), I got back up. I was feeling pretty off kilter for the next few hours, though just because the whole tired-but-wired thing was getting to me - I got some work done on a song, but realized I forgot to do my ear-training. When I finally started feeling tired at around 5, I figured I&rsquo;d lie down for a nap. That&rsquo;s when things got weird. It started with this weird clicking noise I thought was coming from my speakers, but I got up to find that I&rsquo;d turned them off. This happened twice, so I just drank some water and laid down. From then until 6:45, I don&rsquo;t know what happened. I feel like I didn&rsquo;t close my eyes, and I &lsquo;woke up&rsquo; terrified, fearing that I was going insane. A shower calmed me down, and I guess I&rsquo;m okay now, but.. I dunno, this was weird. I&rsquo;ve been feeling strange the past few days, and I&rsquo;m dreading finishing out the week like this - I&rsquo;m thinking it&rsquo;s just stress (mostly stressing myself out - school&rsquo;s not too bad) and hoping it&rsquo;s not the start of some big downswing. Oh well :o/ I&rsquo;ve been drinking less caffeinated stuff, but maybe I&rsquo;ll try cutting it completely</p>
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