zk_html/diary/2005-10-25-13:20:25.html

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                <p><span class="tag">diary</span> <span class="tag">livejournal</span> <span class="tag">fossils</span></p>
<p>So I&rsquo;m not quite sure what happened last night, but I&rsquo;m reasonably sure it wasn&rsquo;t sleep.  I took a shower at about 1 because I was feeling wired and hoped that it&rsquo;d calm me down.  It felt a little like it did, but after just laying there for three hours worrying and thinking my usual stupid thoughts (I get on these &lsquo;what if&rsquo; trains that don&rsquo;t seem very bad at the time, but then I think back on them and I sound like I&rsquo;m terribly depressed, plus some delusions of grandeur), I got back up.  I was feeling pretty off kilter for the next few hours, though just because the whole tired-but-wired thing was getting to me - I got some work done on a song, but realized I forgot to do my ear-training.  When I finally started feeling tired at around 5, I figured I&rsquo;d lie down for a nap.  That&rsquo;s when things got weird.  It started with this weird clicking noise I thought was coming from my speakers, but I got up to find that I&rsquo;d turned them off.  This happened twice, so I just drank some water and laid down.  From then until 6:45, I don&rsquo;t know what happened.  I feel like I didn&rsquo;t close my eyes, and I &lsquo;woke up&rsquo; terrified, fearing that I was going insane.  A shower calmed me down, and I guess I&rsquo;m okay now, but.. I dunno, this was weird.  I&rsquo;ve been feeling strange the past few days, and I&rsquo;m dreading finishing out the week like this - I&rsquo;m thinking it&rsquo;s just stress (mostly stressing myself out - school&rsquo;s not too bad) and hoping it&rsquo;s not the start of some big downswing.  Oh well :o/  I&rsquo;ve been drinking less caffeinated stuff, but maybe I&rsquo;ll try cutting it completely</p>
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update from sparkleup 2020-04-25 06:30:08 +00:00			`<!doctype html>`
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			`<p><span class="tag">diary</span> <span class="tag">livejournal</span> <span class="tag">fossils</span></p>`
update from sparkleup 2020-06-24 07:10:07 +00:00			<p>So I’m not quite sure what happened last night, but I’m reasonably sure it wasn’t sleep. I took a shower at about 1 because I was feeling wired and hoped that it’d calm me down. It felt a little like it did, but after just laying there for three hours worrying and thinking my usual stupid thoughts (I get on these ‘what if’ trains that don’t seem very bad at the time, but then I think back on them and I sound like I’m terribly depressed, plus some delusions of grandeur), I got back up. I was feeling pretty off kilter for the next few hours, though just because the whole tired-but-wired thing was getting to me - I got some work done on a song, but realized I forgot to do my ear-training. When I finally started feeling tired at around 5, I figured I’d lie down for a nap. That’s when things got weird. It started with this weird clicking noise I thought was coming from my speakers, but I got up to find that I’d turned them off. This happened twice, so I just drank some water and laid down. From then until 6:45, I don’t know what happened. I feel like I didn’t close my eyes, and I ‘woke up’ terrified, fearing that I was going insane. A shower calmed me down, and I guess I’m okay now, but.. I dunno, this was weird. I’ve been feeling strange the past few days, and I’m dreading finishing out the week like this - I’m thinking it’s just stress (mostly stressing myself out - school’s not too bad) and hoping it’s not the start of some big downswing. Oh well :o/ I’ve been drinking less caffeinated stuff, but maybe I’ll try cutting it completely</p>
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