update from sparkleup
This commit is contained in:
parent
8220657437
commit
2c4a37bb3c
|
|
@ -32,7 +32,7 @@
|
|||
<p>That ey didn’t know, that ey hadn’t the language, kept em from speaking of it with True Name just yet. It wasn’t out of any need to hide, not out of any embarrassment — though ey’d freely admit to eir shyness — that ey kept it from her. Ey just didn’t know how to say that, when she seemed most like May, ey was at eir most confused without turning it into a series of questions and I-don’t-knows.</p>
|
||||
<p>The one time ey’d brought it up with May, the idea still as yet unseasoned, she had done as she ever would, and teased em gently about ‘falling in love with her’ and then settled into a series of gently probing questions, trying to tease out things that ey already knew but did not yet have the words for.</p>
|
||||
<p>It hadn’t gone anywhere. Ey’d eventually had to put the conversation on hold out of a combination of stress and the feeling that ey ought to keep True Name’s discussion on her newfound multiplicity in the face of May’s desire for some more complete unity to emself.</p>
|
||||
<p>So they did what they could to prepare or relax for the rest of that last day. True name walked her prairie several times over, then came in and sat close by, then busied herself up in her head. May clung to em. Ey sorted notes.</p>
|
||||
<p>So they did what they could to prepare or relax for the rest of that last day. True Name walked her prairie several times over, then came in and sat close by, then busied herself up in her head. May clung to em. Ey sorted notes.</p>
|
||||
<p>There was no discussion whether or not she would be staying with them that night. The three of them simply wound up in eir and May’s bed, sitting or kneeling on the soft mattress while they did their best to talk about little nothings. Ioan tried to explain Romanian curses to them. May and True Name spoke earnestly about a movie ey’d never heard of. And under it all, an ever-rising current of stress lay, slowly taking over their words until they couldn’t speak any longer, could only curl beneath the covers, sharing some more fundamental comfort.</p>
|
||||
<p>Surprising all three of them, they did manage to get at least some sleep that night. It wasn’t <em>good</em> sleep, as, at one point or another, each of them woke with a start, but they managed a few hours of dozing.</p>
|
||||
<p>Once the sky began to lighten, though, they pulled themselves blearily out of bed, Ioan making four mugs of coffee — two black, two sweet and milky — so that they could troop back out onto the plain and wake End Waking up, or, as it turned out, greet him at the small fire he’d started, and offer him a cup of coffee.</p>
|
||||
|
|
@ -42,7 +42,7 @@
|
|||
<p>The only words they spoke to each other was May saying, “Good luck, have fun, and do not die.”</p>
|
||||
<p>The four forks held hands and paws and with nothing other than a shared shaky breath, stepped from the sim.</p>
|
||||
<p>End Waking immediately flinched, crouched. They found themselves in a boardroom. A large plain of a table, notepads and pens, a second table huddling against the wall with a pitcher of water and a stack of too-small glasses.</p>
|
||||
<p>And yet it still felt too small — even to Ioan, who spent more of eir life inside than unbound in a forest, the ceiling was just a few inches too low, the chairs just a few inches too close to the walls. Too small, and yet too long. There was room for a table half again as long, and yet the table was set in one end of the room, leaving the other end empty and unbalanced other than a wheeled whiteboard.. End Waking, who hadn’t been indoors, never mind in a room too small, in nigh on a century, looked on the verge of panic. His eyes were wide, tail hiked and bristled, paws clenched in a way that reminded em of May.</p>
|
||||
<p>And yet it still felt too small — even to Ioan, who spent more of eir life inside than unbound in a forest, the ceiling was just a few inches too low, the chairs just a few inches too close to the walls. Too small, and yet too long. There was room for a table half again as long, and yet the table was set in one end of the room, leaving the other end empty and unbalanced other than a wheeled whiteboard. End Waking, who hadn’t been indoors, never mind in a room too small, in nigh on a century, looked on the verge of panic. His eyes were wide, tail hiked and bristled, paws clenched in a way that reminded em of May.</p>
|
||||
<p>“I do not know if I can–“</p>
|
||||
<p>May squeezed his paw tightly. “You do not need to keep these memories, skunk, but you cannot leave.” She added in a near whisper, “Please do not leave me.”</p>
|
||||
<p>His nod was jerky, distracted, but still a nod.</p>
|
||||
|
|
@ -58,7 +58,7 @@
|
|||
<p>With that in mind, ey could at least do eir best to focus on the subtler forms of language around the room.</p>
|
||||
<p>True Name had talked em through the stanza and their roles beforehand, at least. She herself had been focused on the politics, of course, but also acted as consensus builder among the members of her stanza.</p>
|
||||
<p>Ey knew well that May had been focused on swaying individual hearts and minds toward a cause that initially had been True Name’s, and then later simply shaped by her as best as could be managed.</p>
|
||||
<p>End Waking had been instrumental in tracking, understanding, and to to whatever level possible, influencing financial markets phys-side, though he’d admitted to Ioan, one night out on the plain, that the chances that he’d actually had any effect on the markets was astoundingly low and that the financial trajectory had likely been set by forces larger than they could manage — at least, that was the hope that had kept him going.</p>
|
||||
<p>End Waking had been instrumental in tracking, understanding, and to whatever level possible, influencing financial markets phys-side, though he’d admitted to Ioan, one night out on the plain, that the chances that he’d actually had any effect on the markets was astoundingly low and that the financial trajectory had likely been set by forces larger than they could manage — at least, that was the hope that had kept him going.</p>
|
||||
<p>Ey knew the two ‘Why’s from the history: Why Ask Questions, Here At The End Of All Things was the frightfully friendly crowd-rouser who had worked with groups of individuals sys-side, while Why Ask Questions When The Answers Will Not Help had focused on similar tactics phys-side. However, given that her task was limited to text, she seemed notably out of her element in in-person interactions, coming off as petty and cruel as often as funny and sarcastic.</p>
|
||||
<p>The Only Time I Dream Is When I Need An Answer had acted as a manager, scheduler, and clerk for the enterprise. Wickedly intelligent, she had done more than block in times for meetings; she had organized meetings between precisely the right individuals at precisely the right times.</p>
|
||||
<p>To Know One’s True Name Is To Know God had settled firmly into data analysis, collecting both the raw data that she could from the perisystem feeds and the net phys-side as well as the information collected by her cocladists and the Jonases. She was a being of reports.</p>
|
||||
|
|
@ -86,10 +86,10 @@
|
|||
<p>She shrugged. “Claim? No. I do not know this Zacharias.”</p>
|
||||
<p>“That is–“</p>
|
||||
<p>Jonas laughed, “Just shut up, Zacharias.”</p>
|
||||
<p>“No,” the fox growled, his whiskers all abristle and claws digging at the tabletop. “I played my role, but that does not mean that I am some disposable Judas, here. A role is as much the actor as it is– <em>stop!</em>“</p>
|
||||
<p>“No,” the fox growled, his whiskers all abristle and claws digging at the tabletop. “I played my role, but that does not mean that I am some disposable Judas here. A role is as much the actor as it is– <em>stop!</em>“</p>
|
||||
<p>There was a loud thump beneath the table, though this time, Zacharias appeared to have pulled his foot away in time to keep his toes from being stomped on, as he instead pushed himself away from the table and to his feet. A brief flicker of something akin to rage flashed across Jonas’s face, but was quickly replaced by that bright, friendly grin.</p>
|
||||
<p>“Fine, fuck you too, then.”</p>
|
||||
<p>There was a no signal — or if there was, Ioan missed it — for Guōweī to step into the sim, hand already raised as if for a slap, a short blade held between his fingers. Unassuming, easy to carry, symbolic, and certainly crowded with whatever it was that induced a crash in one’s instance.</p>
|
||||
<p>There was no signal — or if there was, Ioan missed it — for Guōweī to step into the sim, hand already raised as if for a slap, a short blade held between his fingers. Unassuming, easy to carry, symbolic, and certainly crowded with whatever it was that induced a crash in one’s instance.</p>
|
||||
<p>What happened next happened almost too quickly for em to comprehend. Zacharias shouted, but the cry was cut off in a muffled <em>oomf</em> as an instance of May appeared near him, almost totally overlapping the space that he’d occupied. The collision algos knocked him backwards with enough force to slam him against the door, leaving him to crumple to the floor.</p>
|
||||
<p>Guōweī’s palm came down flat against May’s shoulder, but there was no time to see whether or not the virus would affect an instance so far diverged, as that instance of her quit and was immediately replaced with another one, this overlapping the assassin’s space, knocking him back nearly a meter, only for the skunk to fork again to repeat the maneuver. With the momentum already in play, this practically sent the man flying, his head cracking against the wall hard enough to leave a sizeable dent in the drywall.</p>
|
||||
<p>And then it was over. Zacharias’s yell faltered, and he stared up, wide eyed, with his gaze darting between Jonas and the remaining instance of May. The latter had lurched away, looking more disgusted than startled.</p>
|
||||
|
|
@ -103,7 +103,7 @@
|
|||
<p>He laughed, shooting his cuffs. “Well, if <em>that’s</em> all you want, then we could have done without all this fuss, couldn’t we?”</p>
|
||||
<p>“This fuss is necessary, remember,” When I Do Not Remember, the propagandist, said, to which Jonas sighed.</p>
|
||||
<p>“All you need to do is just…go away. Just disappear. Just be gone, True Name. Curl up around your little Name thing and stay there.”</p>
|
||||
<p>May’s expression had settled back to calm, but ey could feel the tension in her paw increase, and beyond her, ey could see End Waking bare his teeth. The Odists on Jonas’s side the of the table flinched. None of them looked pleased. Even Why Ask Questions, jovial as she usually was, seemed to be gritting her teeth.</p>
|
||||
<p>May’s expression had settled back to calm, but ey could feel the tension in her paw increase, and beyond her, ey could see End Waking bare his teeth. The Odists on Jonas’s side of the table flinched. None of them looked pleased. Even Why Ask Questions, jovial as she usually was, seemed to be gritting her teeth.</p>
|
||||
<p><em>Wait, does</em> he <em>know?</em> ey wondered. If ever there was a way to keep a group of Odists in check, that might just be it.</p>
|
||||
<p>Only True Name, of all of them, remained calm. Serious, yes, but calm. “What does disappearing and being gone look like to you, Jonas?” she asked. “Do you…what? Want me to hide away in a locked-down sim forever?”</p>
|
||||
<p>“I wouldn’t say no,” he shot back.</p>
|
||||
|
|
@ -147,7 +147,7 @@
|
|||
<p>And then, it was over.</p>
|
||||
<p>The result was a skunk slightly shorter than True Name had stood, though still a few centimeters taller than May. She was heavier, as well, with a curve to the hips and belly that was familiar to em from eir partner, but unlike May, this softness was more…well, natural wasn’t quite the right term, but where May’s weight seemed to be designed to add a sense of both harmlessness and comfort to her form, this new form of True Name simply looked like a pudgy thirty-something who had settled into a comfortable weight long ago and never bothered to change.</p>
|
||||
<p>Her face had shifted as well, becoming plainer in ways ey couldn’t quite explain. Where True Name had always had some aspect of larger-than-life about her, she now just looked…normal. Still a furry, still living in that form that was more comfortable to her than humanity, but normal.</p>
|
||||
<p>Most striking, though, was the pattern of fur. While much of it was covered now, ey’d seen the way it had shifted during the process. Gone were the two parallel stripes, the ones ey had grown to love on May, replaced with a set of white splotches in the black of her fur. The white atop her head remained, disconnected from patch between her eyes and two others high on her temples. The pattern was eye-catching: the patches seemed to travel in a few uneven lines down over her back and sides, one of them showing a hint of a whorl, another a slight zigzag, and others that were almost round spots. This pattern seemed to be mirrored along her spine, leading to a pleasant symmetry. A quick query of the perisystem infrastructure told em that there was indeed a spotted variety of skunk, described much as ey had seen: spotted fur, shorter tail, a shorter snout that fit somewhere between that of a skunk and that of a weasel like Debarre.</p>
|
||||
<p>Most striking, though, was the pattern of fur. While much of it was covered now, ey’d seen the way it had shifted during the process. Gone were the two parallel stripes, the ones ey had grown to love on May, replaced with a set of white splotches in the black of her fur. The white atop her head remained, disconnected from the patch between her eyes and two others high on her temples. The pattern was eye-catching: the patches seemed to travel in a few uneven lines down over her back and sides, one of them showing a hint of a whorl, another a slight zigzag, and others that were almost round spots. This pattern seemed to be mirrored along her spine, leading to a pleasant symmetry. A quick query of the perisystem infrastructure told em that there was indeed a spotted variety of skunk, described much as ey had seen: spotted fur, shorter tail, a shorter snout that fit somewhere between that of a skunk and that of a weasel like Debarre.</p>
|
||||
<p>Gone were the stripes. Gone, also, were the slacks and blouse, traded in for a linen tunic and a pair of loose-fitting Thai fisherman pants.</p>
|
||||
<p>When ey was finally able to tear eir eyes away, ey saw that every Odist in the room had picked up expressions that verged from taken aback to startled and angry. May, for her part, looked startled at the display, yes, but also excited and ready. It was the same look she got before performances.</p>
|
||||
<p>“May, what–“</p>
|
||||
|
|
@ -180,17 +180,17 @@
|
|||
<p>When their down-tree instances returned to the field from inside — May bearing a (rather lopsided) cake — they were just in time to see True Name bow to Sasha and quit. It was the last change, ey supposed, the true relinquishing of her name.</p>
|
||||
<p>There was a long moment of silence on the plain, then Ioan let out a ragged, pent-up breath, eir shoulders sagging. “Can someone tell me what the fuck just happened?”</p>
|
||||
<p>“Sasha did the one thing she could have done to piss Jonas off most,” May said, grinning. “He went in thinking he’d take everything from her and left with no wind in his sails. Well done, my dear.”</p>
|
||||
<p>Sasha beamed and bowed with a flourish</p>
|
||||
<p>Sasha beamed and bowed with a flourish.</p>
|
||||
<p>“And you knew this?” ey asked.</p>
|
||||
<p>She nodded. “To an extent. We had discussed several options, but many of the changes were new. I saw her unwind all of the changes from the last centuries–“</p>
|
||||
<p>“All the way back to Praiseworthy’s suggestions before Secession,” the other skunk said proudly.</p>
|
||||
<p>“–and other than the spotted skunk thing, she looks just like…well, Sasha. Nice touch, by the way.”</p>
|
||||
<p>“I do not think I could have gotten away with staying the same skunk, even if I look similar enough while clothed. But yes, I am back to the me of… Shit, when did I make Sasha like this? 2110?”</p>
|
||||
<p>“I do not think I could have gotten away with staying the same skunk, even if I look similar enough while clothed. But yes, I am back to the me of…shit, when did I make Sasha like this? 2110?”</p>
|
||||
<p>Ioan shook eir head, dizzy. “This is what you looked like before uploading?”</p>
|
||||
<p>“What my — <em>our</em> — av looked like, yes, all except the change to a spotted skunk. They always felt too flashy, back then, and I just wanted to look like myself offline except a furry. Completely unremarkable and a species no one likes.”</p>
|
||||
<p>“The outfit was my suggestion,” End Waking said. “It always was our favorite, but for some reason, we never brought it with us to the System, and I knew the rest of the stanza would pick up on that.”</p>
|
||||
<p>Sasha nodded.</p>
|
||||
<p>“I am proud of you, Sasha,” he continued. “I do not yet know why I feel compelled to say that, but I am proud of you. You have much to make up for, your own penance yet to serve, but that you have done this at all is good step forward.”</p>
|
||||
<p>“I am proud of you, Sasha,” he continued. “I do not yet know why I feel compelled to say that, but I am proud of you. You have much to make up for, your own penance yet to serve, but that you have done this at all is a good step forward.”</p>
|
||||
<p>Ioan sighed and sat down heavily in the grass. “You’re all completely nuts.”</p>
|
||||
<p>The three skunks laughed.</p>
|
||||
<p>“Why didn’t you tell me?”</p>
|
||||
|
|
@ -200,7 +200,7 @@
|
|||
<p>The other two skunks perked up and grinned wide.</p>
|
||||
<p>Ioan blinked, hesitated, then continued. “May and…E.W. merged down and you…I guess feel more like you used to? Back phys-side, I mean. Enough to head back to who you were before the clade began, I mean. Is that even possible?”</p>
|
||||
<p>“It is not a statement of reality, dear. I cannot reintegrate those aspects of myself that are not up-tree from me, and even if I could, there are those who no longer exist or who have left Lagrange,” she said, that slight smile growing. “It is a statement of hope, perhaps, or a desire for completion. It is an understanding of the ways in which I fall short expressed in my very name. Will this sense of a truer life last? Perhaps. It will certainly not always feel good, and will at some point cease feeling new, but I plan on owning it for as long as I am able.”</p>
|
||||
<p>“And how is it that this pisses of Jonas?” Ey snorted. “He certainly sounded pissed.”</p>
|
||||
<p>“And how is it that this pisses off Jonas?” Ey snorted. “He certainly sounded pissed.”</p>
|
||||
<p>Sasha knelt across from Ioan, followed shortly by E.W. and May to either side of em, May summoning up plates and cutting thick slices of cake. It was strange to see so many smiles, still strange to see May so happy around her down-tree instance and stranger still to see E.W. even near her.</p>
|
||||
<p>“What Jonas was expecting was for me to remain True Name in everything except form and name,” she said. “He was expecting someone deeply cowed by his political genius. And do not underestimate him, he <em>is</em> still a genius. He felt that he had won his spot as rightful leader of Lagrange, if such a thing can even be said to exist. He thought that he had beaten me down and left me either unable to continue or unwilling to try.”</p>
|
||||
<p>May added, “I suspect that he is starting to crack.”</p>
|
||||
|
|
@ -213,7 +213,7 @@
|
|||
<p>“Sasha. I am Sasha. I was her as well,” she said, voice gentle but insistent enough to stop Ioan from continuing.</p>
|
||||
<p>He stepped back a half pace, crouching as though to flee. “Sasha…? What the fuck?”</p>
|
||||
<p>Ioan, still feeling eir head spinning from so much happening so quickly, tried to pin down eir open question in eir mind while still watching the exchange intently.</p>
|
||||
<p>“I am not what I was, Debarre. I am not True Name. I am not May or E.W..” She hesitated, then continued, “I am not even the Sasha you remember, but I am, I think, closer to being her than any of the Ode clade is currently.”</p>
|
||||
<p>“I am not what I was, Debarre. I am not True Name. I am not May or E.W.” She hesitated, then continued, “I am not even the Sasha you remember, but I am, I think, closer to being her than any of the Ode clade is currently.”</p>
|
||||
<p>“Bullshit,” he growled. “If there’s even a little bit of True Name in you, you can’t be her. If you’re even the slightest bit her I’m fucking out of here.”</p>
|
||||
<p>“Wait, my love,” E.W. said. “Please stay.”</p>
|
||||
<p>Debarre hesitated.</p>
|
||||
|
|
@ -232,7 +232,7 @@
|
|||
<p>“Of course.</p>
|
||||
<p>“So tell me how this gets you anything.”</p>
|
||||
<p>Ioan sat up straight once more, unpinning eir question. “You were saying that Jonas thought he’d beaten you.”</p>
|
||||
<p>“Right, yes. He thought that he had left so me broken that I might fade away or even quit of my own accord. Instead, I became the one thing he could not control.”</p>
|
||||
<p>“Right, yes. He thought that he had left me so broken that I might fade away or even quit of my own accord. Instead, I became the one thing he could not control.”</p>
|
||||
<p>“How, though?” ey asked.</p>
|
||||
<p>“Because of the <em>History</em>. The System knows about me. It knows about the Council of Eight and about Sasha and Michelle Hadje. It also knows about True Name, though, and to see that True Name has stepped down and become one of the few sympathetic figures in that same story once again means that he cannot touch me. He cannot risk reinforcing being seen as a villain–“</p>
|
||||
<p>“Or more of one,” May muttered.</p>
|
||||
|
|
@ -256,7 +256,7 @@
|
|||
<p>The three skunks laughed while ey and Debarre leaned across the circle to shake hands.</p>
|
||||
</article>
|
||||
<footer>
|
||||
<p>Page generated on 2022-08-14</p>
|
||||
<p>Page generated on 2022-09-06</p>
|
||||
</footer>
|
||||
</main>
|
||||
<script type="text/javascript">
|
||||
|
|
|
|||
Loading…
Reference in New Issue