update from sparkleup
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<p>The skunk didn’t reply other than to continue whispering ‘no’ quietly.</p>
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<p>“The other lost line is No Longer Myself. She no longer associated with the clade, but still maintained her identity as one of the lines of the first stanza. Of the others I know who have rescinded their clade membership, Sasha, E.W., and May Then My Name all remain in some capacity.”</p>
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<p>A Finger Pointing spoke up, casting a careful sidelong glance at her partner, Beholden. “We have spoken of the Ode, yes, of the two lines, but we should not omit those long-lived instances that were lost. I have lost one of my own up-trees. I have lost A Finger Curled.”</p>
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<p>At this, Beholden burst suddenly into tears, eventually rolling to the side to slip out of the sim. A Finger Pointing quickly forked to follow while the other instance remained.</p>
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<p>At this, Beholden let out a cry and burst suddenly into tears, eventually rolling to the side to slip out of the sim. A Finger Pointing quickly forked to follow while the other instance remained.</p>
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<p>“You are right. I apologize, my dear,” Need An Answer said, bowing. “Of the 28 missing, five are long-lived instances that are not named lines, including A Finger Curled. My condolences to you, to Beholden, and to her up-tree instance.”</p>
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<p>“Do we have enough information to ask about whether or not they’ll be recoverable?” Cress asked. “Serene said we’d need some questions answered first.”</p>
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<p>Dry Grass tilted her head thoughtfully. “None of my forks have reported any success along that front. Most, however, are still processing. When I asked Günay, she simply shrugged and said, “I do not know. Perhaps there is something that can be done with more hands sys-side, but best efforts were made in recovering lost data.”“</p>
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<p>Dry Grass lowered her head as several of the other Odists joined. After a moment, she forked and gathered the Marshans around her, setting up a cone of silence above us.</p>
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<p>“I believe we are done with pertinent business for now, and we are going to circle inwards and discuss those who have been lost,” she said. “I would like to suggest that we give them space. Would you mind stepping away?”</p>
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<p>“Will you come with?” Cress asked, alarmed.</p>
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<p>“Not yet, my love. I will rejoin before long. One of the lost long-lived instances was one of my own, and this will give me a chance to step back and grieve, myself.”</p>
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<p>“Not yet, my love. I will rejoin before long. One of the lost long-lived instances was one of my own, and this will give me a chance to step back and grieve, myself–” Her voice trailed off into a hoarseness that spoke of tears to come.</p>
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<p>Cress’s expression fell, and it wrapped its arms around her. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know…”</p>
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<p>“I did not say,” Dry Grass said, shrugging. Whatever confidence she had been leaning on before was gone. She looked to be struggling to hold herself together. “We will talk later, my love. More of me remain at home, too.”</p>
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<p>“I did not say,” Dry Grass said, shrugging. Whatever confidence she had been leaning on before was gone. She looked to be struggling to hold herself together. “We will talk later. More of me remain at home, too.”</p>
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<p>We all took turns, ensuring that she got a hug from each of us, then stepped away, this time to the pagoda that I had discovered earlier that day before sleeping.</p>
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<p>As we stepped into that foggy morning on the close-shorn grass, the sound of a clanking bell or two from the direction of the sheep, we all let out a pent-up breath together. I wasn’t quite sure what the breath represented for each of us. Even in myself, I couldn’t tell if it was a sigh of resignation, of exhaustion, or of the simple sensation of being just by ourselves again, just those of our clade.</p>
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<p>Oh. Well, there was an idea.</p>
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<p>There was a long silence, followed by a sigh of her own. <em>“Just us?”</em></p>
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<p><em>“Yeah,”</em> I sent. I tried to keep any disappointment out of my voice. It wasn’t hard with how tired I was.</p>
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<p>Another long pause, and then a sense of a nod.</p>
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<p>A few moments after I sent her the address of the sim, she popped into being beside me. Her expression was flat and motions stiff as she walked with me to join the rest of the clade in the pagoda. Even as the rest of the Marshans greeted her, she simply nodded, saying nothing.</p>
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<p>A few moments after I sent her the address of the sim, she popped into being beside me, looking freshly showered. Her expression was flat and motions stiff as she walked with me to join the rest of the clade in the pagoda. Even as the rest of the Marshans greeted her, she simply nodded, saying nothing.</p>
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<p>If I’d been expecting us all to jump into conversation, I was disappointed. However, there was still relief when we fell back into silence, each thinking our thoughts, looking out over the pasture at the fog and the shadows of sheep. The only sounds were those of the sim — a hint of rain further out on the grass, another tinkle or two of a bell — and my own breathing.</p>
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<p>Once more, questions bubbled up within me. What could I possibly do in the face of such enormity? How could 48 billion people just disappear? What was Phys-side doing about all of this other than hiding the details they doubtless had? More ‘how could I’s dogging my heels — how could I be sitting here in silence? How could I have stepped away from Dry Grass, the one person I knew who was working hardest on this? How could I not have looped Lily into this whole conversation?</p>
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<p>Once more, questions bubbled up within me. What could I possibly do in the face of such enormity? How could 48 billion people just disappear? What was phys-side doing about all of this other than hiding the details they doubtless had? More ‘how could I’s dogging my heels — how could I be sitting here in silence? How could I have stepped away from Dry Grass, the one person I knew who was working hardest on this? How could I not have looped Lily into this whole conversation?</p>
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<p>“So,” Lily said. “What’s up?”</p>
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<p>Cress laughed nervously, brushing its hand up through its hair. “Uh…everything.”</p>
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<p>“The folks we went to talk to–” I set aside the fact that I felt compelled to leave out just who those folks were; I was sure Lily could guess. “–were doing some looking around and tallying up losses within their clade and others. It sounds like, if they’re representative of losses across the System, there might be almost fifty billion people missing.”</p>
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<p>Sedge leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees. “There’s always been a bunch of people who hate uploading. Sometimes it’s because they feel like we’ve abandoned Earth, sometimes it’s because everyone makes Lagrange out like some sort of heaven while Earth is still kind of hellish. Even after all the work they’ve gotten done in the last fifty years, even with a lot of the climate shit either halted or actively starting to improve, Earth has hardly gone back to what it was like back before the industrial revolution or whatever.”</p>
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<p>“Yeah, but hate it enough to destroy it? Kill billions and billions of people?”</p>
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<p>“I’m not sure they think of us as people.”</p>
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<p>Lily snorted. “Not as people,” she sneered. “Sorry, Sedge, I know it’s not on you. You’re probably right. I’m just feeling like shit now.”</p>
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<p>Lily snorted. “‘Not as people’,” she sneered. “Sorry, Sedge, I know it’s not on you. You’re probably right. I’m just feeling like shit now.”</p>
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<p>Rush smiled faintly. “I think we all are.”</p>
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<p>“And you said no sims have been hit?” she asked. “You’re the one of us who’s at all interested in that.”</p>
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<p>Ve nodded. “Yeah. Ser… Well, some of the people we’d been talking to were sim designers, and they said they hadn’t seen any of their sims messed up or disappeared or anything.”</p>
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