update from sparkleup
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<p>“Excellent, O great wordsmith.”</p>
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<p>Ey laughed and tweaked her ear before hoisting emself up onto the edge of the state next to her. Predictably, she scooted closer so that she could lean against eir side. “Who would’ve thought, hmm? You getting me into theatre and me getting you into writing.”</p>
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<p>“This is still theatre! Just earlier on in the process,” she said, indignant. “But yes, it is proof that the Bălans can shove us around instead of only the other way around.”</p>
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<p>Ey gave the skunk a playful shove with eir shoulder, at which she let out an outsized yelp followed by a whimper. “So mean!”</p>
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<p>Ey gave her a playful shove with eir shoulder, at which she let out an outsized yelp followed by a whimper. “So mean!”</p>
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<p>“Yeah, that’s me. Meanest person you know.”</p>
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<p>She rolled her eyes.</p>
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<p>Ey let a long silence play, then, looking out into the cool darkness of the theater while eir partner summoned up her notebook and scribbled down eir tip from earlier.</p>
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<p>“Do you really feel that way?”</p>
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<p>“Mm?”</p>
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<p>“The jagged edges and self-loathing.”</p>
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<p>She shrugged. “There is some of me in there, yes, but it is still theatre, my dear. It is about taking the particular and making it universal, if only for a little while, yes?”</p>
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<p>She shrugged. “There is some of me in there, yes, but it is still theatre. It is about taking the particular and making it universal, if only for a little while, yes?”</p>
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<p>Ey nodded.</p>
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<p>When ey didn’t reply otherwise, she shrugged and continued, “I would not say that I agree with that “I loathe myself, so imagine how much I love others” bit. I do not loathe myself, and yet I still love others. Have loved and will love in the future, even, and I see no change in my rare moments of self-loathing.”</p>
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<p>Ey laughed. “‘Will love in the future’? You leaving me for some handsome guy you met in a bar, then?”</p>
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@ -52,15 +52,15 @@
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<p>Ey nodded slowly.</p>
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<p>“I have no plans for such, Ioan,” she added quickly. “You are stuck with me for a good while yet.”</p>
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<p>“What? Oh, no,” ey said, shaking eir head to clear a few too many thoughts. “I trust you on that, May. Just got me thinking. Do you still love all the others you’ve been with?”</p>
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<p>She laughed. “What I said does not just apply to you. Of course I still love them. Some long-diverged forks of me are even still in relationships with some of them.”</p>
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<p>She laughed. “What I said does not apply just to you. Of course I still love them. Some long-diverged forks of me are even still in relationships with their partners.”</p>
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<p>“So you’ve said. You still love them as the root instance, though?”</p>
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<p>She nodded. “I do not begin relationships as anything other than my root instance. I do not know why, but it does not feel fair of me to do anything but.”</p>
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<p>“Oh, so none of your forks went on to fork for other relationships?”</p>
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<p>“Not that I know of, no. It is a firm conviction, so I would imagine that they hold to it, but perhaps some older ones have diverged.”</p>
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<p>“Not that I know of, no. It is a firm conviction, so I would imagine that they hold to it, but perhaps some older ones have diverged. We do not speak much.”</p>
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<p>“How many are there, anyway?”</p>
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<p>She lifted her head to dot her nose against eir cheek. “Are you jealous, my dear?” Her voice was calm and curious. Calm enough and curious enough, some distant part of em noted, that it kept em from falling immediately into defensiveness.</p>
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<p>“I get the occasional pangs,” ey said after a long minute’s thought. “More so early on. When ey was first getting settled in eir relationship, Codrin told me about something that Dear had told em shortly after ey’d been forked, “Jealousy is a sign of needs not met”. Whenever I start feeling jealous, that’s usually a sign for me to take a step back and think about what need that might be.”</p>
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<p>“See, this is what I like about you, my dear. You feel a thing and then think about it until you understand it. Sometimes a little too much, but it has served you well.”</p>
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<p>“I get the occasional pangs, more so only on,” ey said after a long moment’s thought. “When ey was first getting settled in eir relationship, Codrin told me about something that Dear had told em shortly after ey’d been forked, “Jealousy is a sign of needs not met”. Whenever I start feeling jealous, that’s usually a sign for me to take a step back and think about what need that might be.”</p>
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<p>“See, this is what I like about you, Ioan. You feel a thing and then think about it until you understand it. Sometimes a little too much, but it has served you well.”</p>
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<p>Ey tilted eir cheek to rest it atop her head, a bit of closeness that also served the purpose of stopping her ear-tip from tickling eir neck.</p>
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<p>“I feel a thing and am helpless before it. I cannot but wrap myself up in…it…” she said, pulling out her notebook again to jot down the words as they came. “Love, hatred, hunger, exhaustion. I am built for them all, and I cannot do a thing about them…”</p>
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<p>Ey shared a secret smile with emself as the skunk trailed off, continuing to write, tongue-tip peeking out from her muzzle.</p>
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@ -75,8 +75,8 @@
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<p>“Absolutely not, no.”</p>
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<p>Ey tugged on her ear. “Fascinated and annoyed.”</p>
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<p>“Yes, well, too bad. You remain stuck with me, Mx. Bălan.” She continued more seriously, “I did not expect this to be fascinating to you. I try to be careful talking about my other relationships.”</p>
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<p>“I don’t really mind,” ey said after giving it due thought. “That was past May, right? It’d be like getting upset over someone else having had relationships in the past, or you having exes. If it were multiple partners at the same time, that’d probably be a separate conversation.”</p>
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<p>She shook her head. “I could not do that. I am not built the same as Dear. I am only in multiple relationships in the sense that there are multiple mes, but only ever one me involved with one other.”</p>
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<p>“I don’t really mind,” ey said after giving it due thought. “That was past May, right? It’d be like getting upset over someone else having exes. If it were multiple partners at the same time, that’d probably be a separate conversation.”</p>
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<p>She shook her head. “I could not do that. I am not built the same as Dear. I am only in multiple relationships in the sense that there are multiple mes, but there is only ever one me involved with one other.”</p>
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<p>“Why?”</p>
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<p>“Because,” she said, rolling onto her back so that she could smile up to em. “I am also helpless before devotion, and that takes the whole of me.”</p>
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<p>“What about Douglas or that night with A Finger Pointing?”</p>
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<p>“And Douglas?”</p>
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<p>Her answer was a while in coming. “Were our friendship to head in that direction, I would fork, but I do not foresee that being the case.”</p>
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<p>“Really?” Ey frowned. “Wouldn’t that be awkward? Us going over there to see him and the other you together?”</p>
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<p>“Oh, incredibly awkward,” she said, rolling her eyes. “I have done similar in the past, and it would take a year or two to shake out. It is uncomfortable for me, as well, as I am left with the same desire even as my up-tree instance gets fulfillment.”</p>
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<p>“Oh, incredibly awkward,” she said, rolling her eyes. “I have done similar in the past, and it would take a year or two to shake out. It is uncomfortable for me, as well, as I am left with the same desire even as my down-tree instance gets fulfillment and they are left with love for you.”</p>
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<p>“I can imagine.”</p>
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<p>“No, Ioan, I do not think you can,” she said primly. “You actually think about the way you feel as you are feeling it like a normal person rather than just crashing headlong into overwhelming emotions like a fucking Odist.”</p>
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<p>“Well, fair.”</p>
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<p>“I do not think we need to worry about that, though. I am comfortable with my friendship with him just as I am comfortable loving you, and should someone catch my eye–“</p>
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<p>“I think you’d need to start going to more bars, though.”</p>
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<p>“You’d need to start going to more libraries, I think.”</p>
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<p>She laughed and shook her head, continuing, “–should someone catch my eye — or yours, for that matter — we will tackle it then with plenty of talking.”</p>
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<p>“Oh, I believe you on that. Skunks never shut up.”</p>
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<p>She made as if to bite em on the belly and, when ey flinched away, grinned up to em. “Mx. Ioan Bălan, you are the one asking all the questions with long, involved answers. Do not pin this on me.”</p>
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<p>“Yeah, yeah. You just got me thinking is all. I think you’re giving me too much credit, saying someone might catch my eye, though.”</p>
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<p>“Yeah, yeah. You just got me thinking is all. I think you’re giving me too much credit saying someone might catch my eye, though.”</p>
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<p>“Why?”</p>
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<p>Ey shrugged. “I’m not exactly that observant.”</p>
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<p>“You worked as a professional observer for, what, a century?”</p>
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<p>“Not <em>that</em> kind of observation.”</p>
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<p>The skunk laughed. “Well, okay, yes. I will not discount the possibility, though. If we are in this life for yet more centuries, there is no harm in being deliberate. Plus, I will get an inordinate amount of satisfaction out of seeing you fall for someone. It was so wholesome the first time! I see no reason why it should not be the subsequent times.”</p>
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<p>She laughed. “Well, okay, yes. I will not discount the possibility, though. If we are in this life for yet more centuries, there is no harm in being deliberate. Plus, I will get an inordinate amount of satisfaction out of seeing you fall for someone. It was so wholesome the first time! I see no reason why it should not be the subsequent times.”</p>
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<p>“I guess. I don’t know if there’s anyone who–“</p>
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<p>She waved a paw dismissively. “If there is not, there is not. We can speak in hypotheticals like fucking grown-ups, Ionuț.”</p>
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<p>She waved a paw dismissively. “If there is not, there is not. We can speak in hypotheticals like fucking grown-ups.”</p>
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<p>“Fine, fine.”</p>
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<p>When the silence drew out, May grabbed one of eir hands and started mouthing on eir fingers.</p>
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<p>“Ow!” Ey laughed and tapped a finger on her nose lightly. “You’re adorable.”</p>
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<p>When the silence drew out, May grabbed one of eir hands and started mouthing on eir fingers, sharp skunk teeth just pricking skin.</p>
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<p>“Ow!” Ey laughed and tapped a finger on her nose lightly. “You’re a pest.”</p>
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<p>She licked at eir fingertip, saying, “Thank you, my dear, in all earnestness. It makes me happy to be able to have a conversation about this.”</p>
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<p>“Of course, May. I figure it ought to be an open topic for us.”</p>
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<p>She nodded and stretched out on the stage. “Agreed. We can come back to it later, though. I would like to run this through once more,” she said, waggling the notebook at em. “And then head home to get ready for dinner. Debarre is coming over and I plan on flirting with him outrageously in front of you all night to make you as jealous as I can.”</p>
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<p>She nodded and stretched out on the stage. “Agreed. We can come back to it later, though. I would like to run this through once more,” she said, waggling the notebook at em. “And then head home to get ready for dinner. Debarre is coming over and I plan on flirting with him outrageously in front of you all night long to see if I can make you jealous.”</p>
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<p>Ey laughed and pushed at her until she sat up before sliding off the stage and walking back to eir seat. “Alright. Once more, from the top.”</p>
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</article>
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<footer>
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