update from sparkleup
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<p>Reed stumbled to the side, laughing. Their own champagne from earlier added a pleasant freedom of movement he only ever noticed at two drinks. Any more and he became too loose and had a hard time staying upright. Any less and he didn’t notice that any freedom was lacking.</p>
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<p>Reed stumbled to the side, laughing. Their own champagne from earlier added a pleasant freedom of movement he only ever noticed at two drinks. Any more and he became too loose and had a hard time staying upright. Any less and he didn’t notice that any freedom was lacking.</p>
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<p>“Is that so bad?” he said. “Alternatively: am I not allowed to be a bit maudlin? It’s fucking New Year’s, Hanne.”</p>
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<p>“Is that so bad?” he said. “Alternatively: am I not allowed to be a bit maudlin? It’s fucking New Year’s, Hanne.”</p>
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<p>“Maudlin? Is that even the right word?”</p>
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<p>“Maudlin? Is that even the right word?”</p>
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<p>“What? Uh…” He hunted down a dictionary on the exchange, prowled through it. “Oh. Saccharine, maybe? I don’t know. Maudlin still kind of works, doesn’t it?”</p>
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<p>“What? Uh…” He hunted down a dictionary on the exchange, prowled through it. “Oh. Saccharine, maybe? I don’t know. <a href="Maudlin.html">Maudlin</a> still kind of works, doesn’t it?”</p>
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<p>She titled her head at him.</p>
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<p>She titled her head at him.</p>
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<p>“”Extremely sentimental,” it says. Pretty sure that fits.”</p>
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<p>“”Extremely sentimental,” it says. Pretty sure that fits.”</p>
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<p>Hanne rolled her eyes, grinning. “Okay, yeah, that fits you to a tee.”</p>
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<p>Hanne rolled her eyes, grinning. “Okay, yeah, that fits you to a tee.”</p>
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<p>“Reed!” Hanne shouted, standing and stamping her foot. Quiet fell in the room. She spoke carefully, and he could hear anger just beneath that tone. “What happened?”</p>
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<p>“Reed!” Hanne shouted, standing and stamping her foot. Quiet fell in the room. She spoke carefully, and he could hear anger just beneath that tone. “What happened?”</p>
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<p>The rest of the clade looked to him as well, and he quailed under so many gazes. “I can’t quit. I can’t merge down. I can’t reach Marsh. He–” his voice gave out and he had to take a sip of water. “He’s not on Lagrange, as far as I can tell.”</p>
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<p>The rest of the clade looked to him as well, and he quailed under so many gazes. “I can’t quit. I can’t merge down. I can’t reach Marsh. He–” his voice gave out and he had to take a sip of water. “He’s not on Lagrange, as far as I can tell.”</p>
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<p>00:07.</p>
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<p>00:07.</p>
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<!----->
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<p>Silence fell thick across the room. The clade — Marsh’s clade — stared, wide-eyed. Their expressions ranged for unsure to terrified. He couldn’t even begin to imagine what expression showed on his face.</p>
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<p>“Okay, no, hold on,” Hanne said, shaking her head and waving her hand. She appeared to have willed drunkenness away much as he had, as her voice was clear, holding more frustration than the panic he felt. “Did he quit? He couldn’t have, right? You just talked to him earlier today.”</p>
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<p>He nodded.</p>
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<p>“And he said nothing about quitting?”</p>
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<p>“Nothing.”</p>
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<p>Hanne glanced around the room, singling out Marsh’s other two immediate up-tree instances, Cress and Lily. Both shook their heads.</p>
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<p>“I was just talking to him about an hour ago, actually. He and Vos were wrapping up the first part of the night’s celebration and they were going to–“</p>
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<p>“Vos!” Reed shouted. “Shit, sorry Lily.”</p>
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<p>It took a minute for Vos to respond to Reed’s ping. <em>Reed? It’s been a bit. What’s up?</em></p>
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<p><em>Is Marsh there?</em> he sent back.</p>
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<p><em>I don’t know. I figured he was in the study waiting on you. It’s been a bit and I just made us drinks, but he’s not in there now. Is something wrong?</em></p>
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<p><em>Can you ping him?</em></p>
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<p>There was a short pause, followed by a sensorium glimpse of a familiar room, that study from so long ago, every flat surface that wasn’t the floor covered in stacks of unread books. Empty.</p>
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<p><em>What’s happening?</em> Vos sent. There was an edge of caution to her voice, the sound of a thin barrier keeping worry at bay.</p>
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<p><em>Pierre?</em></p>
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<p><em>One second.</em> There was a pause, and then, quickly, <em>Wait, can we just come over? What’s your address?</em></p>
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<p>He messaged over the address, and a few seconds later, Fenne Vos and Pierre LaFontaine arrived holding hands, leading to another yelp from Hanne. </p>
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<p>“Vos! Hi,” she said, preempting any of Marsh’s up-tree instances. “Do you know where Marsh is?”</p>
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<p>Some small part of Reed looked on in admiration. Hanne had kept much of the panic that was coursing through him and his cocladists out of her voice. He could feel a shout building within him, and he knew from past experiences with Vos and Pierre that that would only make things worse.</p>
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<p>“We didn’t see him around,” Vos answered, and that barrier between caution and worry seemed to be giving way. “Why? If you’re all here, I’m guessing something happened?”</p>
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<p>“Have you been able to ping him?”</p>
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<p>Both Vos and Pierre shook their heads.</p>
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<p>The sight of Cress and Tule bowing their heads to whisper to each other caught Reed’s eye, and a moment later their partner, a stocky woman with curly black hair, appeared between them, looking as though she’d come straight from a party, herself.</p>
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<p>“Stop!” Hanne said, followed by a nervous laugh at the silence that resulted. She gestured absentmindedly with a hand, pressing the bounds of the sim outward to expand the room. It had started getting more crowded. “You’re doing it again, Reed.”</p>
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<p>“What?” He tamped down indignation. “Sorry, Hanne, there’s a lot going on.”</p>
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<p>“Right, I get that, but can you start at the beginning for those of us outside the clade? What did you mean you don’t think he’s on Lagrange?”</p>
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<p>At this, both Vos and Pierre took a half-step back, looking startled.</p>
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<p>00:11</p>
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<p>Reed spent a moment composing himself. He stood up straighter, brushed his hands down over his shirt, and nodded. “Right. I’m sorry, love. When midnight hit, I forked and tried to quit as usual. I couldn’t, though. The System wouldn’t let me.”</p>
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<p>Cress and Tule’s partner, I Remember The Rattle Of Dry Grass of the Ode clade, stood up stock straight, all grogginess from the party fleeing her features.</p>
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<p>“That’s only supposed to happen when quitting would mean the loss of too much memory, though. The root instance can barely quit at all in the older clades–” Dry Grass winced. Reed did his best to ignore it. “–because the System really doesn’t like losing a life if it won’t be merged down into a down-tree instance.”</p>
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<p>“So, you couldn’t quit because…” Hanne said, urging him on.</p>
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<p>“Well, I imagine the same is true for anyone with lots of memory inside them. If there’s no one to merge down into, it just looks like…like…”</p>
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<p>“Like death,” Dry Grass said darkly. “It looks like death. You could not quit because, to the System, you and all of your memories would die. That is what it felt like, is it not? It felt like you could not possibly quit without pushing the weight of the world uphill?”</p>
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<p>Reed frowned. “Perhaps not all that, but it certainly felt like I was trying to push against something really hard. It didn’t feel like it was impossible like anything else the System would prohibit, it just felt like I was being forced away from that option.”</p>
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<p>“Like death,” she muttered again. “Marsh is not on the System, then, no.”</p>
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<p>“So is he…is Marsh dead?” Pierre whispered. Vos towered over him — over all of them, really — and had always seemed as though she could weather a storm better than any stone, but now, both looked suddenly frail, fragile in the face of the loss they were all talking around</p>
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<p>“He’s not on the System,” Reed and Dry Grass echoed in unison.</p>
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<p>“How can you be sure, though?” Hanne asked. “You can’t merge down, sure, and you can’t ping, but could he just be in some locked down sim or a privacy cone or something? Can those even block merges?”</p>
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<p>Lily shook her head. “Not that I know of, no. I don’t think anything blocks a merge.”</p>
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<p>“Nothing blocks merges, correct,” Dry Grass said. “That would leave potentially much in the way of memory lingering with nowhere to go, and the System does not work that way.”</p>
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<p>Slowly, all within the room had begun to face her rather than Reed, at which he breathed a silent sigh of relief. That he was the oldest fork of Marsh’s didn’t necessarily give him any more of the information that they all so desperately craved.</p>
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<p>“How do you know, love?” Tule was asking.</p>
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<p>“I worked as a sys-side System tech.”</p>
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<p>Cress laughed. It sounded forced. “And you never thought to tell us?”</p>
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<p>“This was before you were born, my dear. Before Marsh’s parents were born, even. It was a long time ago, and I have since moved on.”</p>
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<p>“Well, is there a way to find out what happened?”</p>
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<p>She frowned down to her feet as she thought. “It used to be that there rotated audit logs for events like forking and quitting. I do not know if those are kept any longer, though, given how large they would get in a very short amount of time. Perhaps?”</p>
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<p>“Well, how do we check those?” Rush said, speaking up for the first time since that initial clamor of voices.</p>
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<p>Dry Grass spread her hands helplessly. “I do not know. Again, it has been two centuries since I worked as a System tech. The technology has changed much. I would need time to remember. Time to research.”</p>
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<p>“Do we even have time?” Lily growled at her, frustration apparently winning out over panic. Cress and Tule both gave her a sharp glance.</p>
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<p>“I do not know. I am sorry,” Dry Grass said, bowing. “I will fork and read up as fast as I can. May I remain here?”</p>
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<p>“Please,” Cress and Tule said in unison. The rest of the clade along with Marsh’s partners all nodded. Lily did not. Hanne only frowned.</p>
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</article>
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<footer>
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<p>Page generated on 2022-12-27</p>
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<p>Page generated on 2023-01-17</p>
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