From 611b47d5145523aa9217b4375258849c0e4bb8b1 Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: Madison Scott-Clary Date: Sat, 10 Feb 2024 11:20:10 -0800 Subject: [PATCH] update from sparkleup --- writing/post-self/pinocchio/001.html | 8 ++++++-- writing/post-self/pinocchio/index.html | 14 ++++++++++---- 2 files changed, 16 insertions(+), 6 deletions(-) diff --git a/writing/post-self/pinocchio/001.html b/writing/post-self/pinocchio/001.html index b924db324..ef61f760e 100644 --- a/writing/post-self/pinocchio/001.html +++ b/writing/post-self/pinocchio/001.html @@ -26,10 +26,14 @@

She has rituals for getting dressed, for clothing the form with which the world sees her. She must choose a garment that fits her body and one that fits her mood. You must understand: every time she gets dressed, there is a moment of scrying into her deepest self and estimating how it is that she feels that day. And should her mood change, should those feelings shift, she will find her clothing itchy and uncomfortable, and if her form becomes not what it once was, her clothing will become uncomfortably tight or perhaps she will disappear down into the folds of fabric.

She has rituals for entering a room, for passing through a door. She must touch the door frame beside her shoulder, must brush her fingers against the wood or stone or metal or some more abstract substance. You must understand: she has to do this for every door she walks through, and for this reason, there is a door in the house where she lives that was built by a friend of her friend that leads directly out into a city. She opens the closest door and steps out onto a concrete sidewalk lined with trees and passers by, where the sun shines bright and the air burns cold in her nostrils and the dry leaves skitter anxiously about her feet. As she steps out, she can brush her hand to the door frame.

I do not know where these rituals come from, and perhaps some of my readers will immediately say, “OCD? Does the woman have obsessive compulsive disorder?”

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No, friend, I do not think she does. I know that there are obsessions within her, yes, and I am sure that these rituals feel compulsory, but

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No, friend, I do not think she does. I know that there are obsessions within her, yes, and I am sure that these rituals feel compulsory, but there is something different about the woman. She is too present. She is too much herself, too human, too embodied within her vessel as it spirals out of control, too stuck in her mind as it twists in on itself. She is not struck by a disorder, she is struck by a constant overwhelm, a constant overflowing.

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The woman uploaded when she was overflowing. She lived within that overflow for years, for seven years she was overflowing, she was trapped within her mind and within the vessel of her body, and she lived as best she can as her body spiraled out of control.

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Readers, you must understand that she was in so many ways whole still!

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She campaigned for herself and for the others as damaged as her, but I think this was borne out of trauma and desperation as much as it was care for her loved ones lost and found.

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She campaigned after uploading for individual rights for uploaded minds, before they were even cladists