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<p><span class="tag">writing</span> <span class="tag">short-story</span> <span class="tag">post-self</span> <span class="tag">fiction</span> <span class="tag">scifi</span></p>
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<h1 id="ioan-balan-2326">Ioan Balan — 2326</h1>
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<p>There comes a point in every relationship, Ioan supposed, when the thing stops feeling new and starts feeling like routine. Ey even looked it up one point, shortly after ey and May Then My Name Die With Me and gone on a brief dive into the whole concept of new relationship energy. It was an afternoon’s diversion, and then ey had mostly forgotten about it.</p>
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<p>There comes a point in every relationship, Ioan supposed, when the thing stops feeling new and starts feeling like routine. Ey even looked it up one point, shortly after ey and May Then My Name Die With Me and gone on a brief dive into the whole concept of limerence and new relationship energy. It was an afternoon’s diversion, and then ey had mostly forgotten about it.</p>
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<p>Besides, it seemed to apply most heavily to crushes, infatuation, dating. All those things that ey had forever forgotten about or skipped or just plain missed by virtue of happenstance.</p>
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<p>But this relationship hadn’t started with a crush. It hadn’t started with infatuation or any sort of dating that ey could put eir finger on. It had just…started. Ey had realized one day that perhaps ey and May were already in a relationship and the fact had just never been acknowledged.</p>
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<p>So ey asked, and she had said, “Probably, do you think we are?” and suddenly they were in a relationship.</p>
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<p>So ey asked, and she had said, “What do you think? Are we?” and suddenly they were in a relationship.</p>
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<p>Or had been for months. Whatever.</p>
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<p>Thinking back before that, there had been so many anxiously dismissed what-ifs and idle musings on emotional entanglement. On one notable moment, ey had let play forward a tape of who ey might become if ey backed away from her in parallel with a tape of what might happen if they drifted closer together, fallen helplessly in love. Perhaps that was the moment. Perhaps that had been the moment ey had fallen in love and simply not recognized it yet.</p>
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<p>Ey had been, as ey was now, sitting on one of the beanbags that had found their way scattered throughout the house. Or as close as one could get to sitting in the slumpy things.</p>
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<p>She had been, as she was now, curled against eir side, with both of them working on their own things, ey on tidying up eir interviews and her on her mythologizing. Ey on a sheet of paper and lap desk with one of eir nice pens, her in her head, dreaming, dreaming, dreaming.</p>
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<p>And ey had, as ey did now, set aside eir paper and desk and pen to rest eir eyes and placed a kiss atop her head, right between her ears — a friendly gesture, one that had at first been too packed with meaning for em to return, but finally one that ey gave once, then twice, and eventually, more freely than that — and curled toward her, where she fit so nicely against em.</p>
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<p>“Ioan,” she said.</p>
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<p>“Mm?”</p>
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<p>“<em>May</em> I be tricksy?”</p>
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<p>Ey hesitated, for, though it had been months of them exploring romance, more than a year of living together, the topic of anything sensual had failed to come up. <em>How very like me,</em> ey thought. <em>I’d forget my body exists if I wasn’t so firmly attached to it.</em></p>
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<p>Ey hesitated, for, though it had been months of them exploring romance, years of living together, the topic of anything sexual had failed to come up in any meaningful way, and ey had a guess as to this affection-with-direction. <em>How very like me,</em> ey thought. <em>I’d forget my body exists if I wasn’t so firmly attached to it.</em></p>
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<p>And ey did as ey always had and always would, and analyzed that feeling, analyzed that anxiety, analyzed that excitement and fear so thoroughly intertwined. If May’s existence was rooted in the desire to feel, then she was doing admirably, and if her desire was to induce feelings in em, then she succeeded that as well. She would ever do as she was meant to, and now, ey would be here with her.</p>
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<p>Ey nodded.</p>
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<p>“Close your eyes.”</p>
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<p>It was a long time before either of them moved, despite the occasional itch or tickle or cramp, and Ioan did not notice when May’s side of the shared moment began to blur with sleep, for ey was already there with her.</p>
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</article>
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<footer>
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<p>Page generated on 2023-05-10</p>
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<p>Page generated on 2024-02-06</p>
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</footer>
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</main>
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