update from sparkleup
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Madison Scott-Clary
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@ -204,16 +204,16 @@ how say</dd>
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<li class="done3"> <a href="remote/codrin/007.html">Codrin Bălan#Artemis</a> — AWNH breaks down (revealing she’s AWNH, not WAQ), quits, break immediately called, TN is having a REALLY HARD TIME, Turun Ka shows up, TN comes clean, talks about getting lost, Turun Ka says Artante’s race ran into similar, but stops her from talking about AWNH further for now - 2109</li>
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<li class="done3"> <a href="local/codrin/010.html">Codrin Bălan#Castor</a> — TN gets news re: AWNH (a fork enters the space, quits, merges - Artemisians like huh???), calls halt to meeting, preempts everyone getting news separately by announcing what happened, Codrin and Sarah confirm they’ve heard, tries to gloss over the swap quickly (b/c of course she’s planned), but Turun Ka speaks up, says that this is part of confirmation required. For what? Tune in next time… - 1884</li>
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<li class="done3"> <a href="ioan/009.html">Ioan Bălan</a> — Ioan meets up with True Name at a neutral place to talk about the cracks showing, death of Death Itself and I Do Not Know; growing empathy for True Name - 2326</li>
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<li class="done2"> <a href="remote/codrin/008.html">Codrin Bălan#Artemis</a> — Codrin, Sarah, Turun Ko, Artante meet up (while TN talks with Turun Ka, Iska, and Tycho chills with Stolon) and discuss actual point of meetings: to determine whether humanity is a suitable fifthrace. None of the Artemisians know/will say what the gating factors are, but think they’re close - don’t tell TN (are they supposed to know? Shrug, but implied if they tell TN, that’s a point against them) - 2046</li>
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<li class="done3"> <a href="remote/codrin/008.html">Codrin Bălan#Artemis</a> — Codrin, Sarah, Turun Ko, Artante meet up (while TN talks with Turun Ka, Iska, and Tycho chills with Stolon) and discuss actual point of meetings: to determine whether humanity is a suitable fifthrace. None of the Artemisians know/will say what the gating factors are, but think they’re close - don’t tell TN (are they supposed to know? Shrug, but implied if they tell TN, that’s a point against them) - 2046</li>
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<li class="rejected"> MERGED ABOVE <!--<a href="remote/tycho/004.html">Tycho Brahe#Artemis</a> --- While all the above is happening, Tycho steals some time with Stolon to try and talk science, but they both wind up talking about being in over one's head and the futility of politics vs stability of science - 1040 - TODO merge up--></li>
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<li class="done2"> <a href="local/codrin/011.html">Codrin Bălan#Castor</a> — Codrin gives Turun Ko a copy of <em>On the Origin of Our World</em> (against TN’s suggestion, but she is in damage-control mode), which, after it reads it, turns out to be the penultimate step towards moving forward with accepting as fifthrace. Yay Codrin - 2599</li>
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<li class="done3"> <a href="local/codrin/011.html">Codrin Bălan#Castor</a> — Codrin gives Turun Ko a copy of <em>On the Origin of Our World</em> (against TN’s suggestion, but she is in damage-control mode), which, after it reads it, turns out to be the penultimate step towards moving forward with accepting as fifthrace. Yay Codrin - 2599</li>
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<li class="rejected"> REJECTED too much rambling <!-- <a href="local/tycho/013.html">Tycho Brahe#Castor</a> --- Steals time with Stolon on break, joined by Iska and Sarah, talk about joining Artemis, what races have learned from each other re: science. --></li>
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<li class="done2"> <a href="ioan/008.html">Ioan Bălan</a> — Sarah Genet gets in touch. May is feeling rough, so she mostly talks with Ioan, who talks with May after, feeling better. - 2708</li>
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<li class="done2"> <a href="remote/tycho/005.html">Tycho Brahe#Artemis</a> — Watching talks resume, starting to think y’know what, fuck it, maybe he’ll just stay if allowed. Stolon’s neat, the science is good, and having this to look forward to has given him more purpose in life. Interrupts talk to mention such regardless of glares from TN. Silence from Artemisians, one can assume internal chatter, then “that was the final gating step - wanting to join. We will welcome you as fifthrace” - (Deferred: from there they will learn all they want, have X days to do exchange, share entire libraries back and forth on data band, can keep format however they want on Castor. TN FROWNS but WHATEVER FINE) - 2257</li>
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<li class="done3"> <a href="ioan/008.html">Ioan Bălan</a> — Sarah Genet gets in touch. May is feeling rough, so she mostly talks with Ioan, who talks with May after, feeling better. - 2708</li>
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<li class="done3"> <a href="remote/tycho/005.html">Tycho Brahe#Artemis</a> — Watching talks resume, starting to think y’know what, fuck it, maybe he’ll just stay if allowed. Stolon’s neat, the science is good, and having this to look forward to has given him more purpose in life. Interrupts talk to mention such regardless of glares from TN. Silence from Artemisians, one can assume internal chatter, then “that was the final gating step - wanting to join. We will welcome you as fifthrace” - (Deferred: from there they will learn all they want, have X days to do exchange, share entire libraries back and forth on data band, can keep format however they want on Castor. TN FROWNS but WHATEVER FINE) - 2257</li>
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</ul>
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</li>
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<li class="done2"> Integration - DMZ expands, several upload to Artemis<ul>
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<li class="done2"> <a href="local/tycho/014.html">Tycho Brahe</a> — Fresh out of talks, merges back with #tracker in sim, looks up at the sky, new big feelings, TN shows up w/champagne. She’s kind of sad, but guess it went okay, says she’s trying to be earnest about just wanting to have something to celebrate with someone else, but isn’t sure she knows how anymore. Cracks showing as growth collides with eternal memory. - 2233</li>
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<li class="done3"> <a href="local/tycho/014.html">Tycho Brahe</a> — Fresh out of talks, merges back with #tracker in sim, looks up at the sky, new big feelings, TN shows up w/champagne. She’s kind of sad, but guess it went okay, says she’s trying to be earnest about just wanting to have something to celebrate with someone else, but isn’t sure she knows how anymore. Cracks showing as growth collides with eternal memory. - 2233</li>
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<li class="rejected"> REJECTED too much unless I think of another purpose <a href="ioan/007.html">Ioan Bălan</a> — Ioan and May speculate on how True Name must be taking it Pollux, suggest Codrin’s grand gesture for Dear being bringing the polycule to the DMZ, more on stability re: Odists.</li>
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<li class="done2"> <a href="local/codrin/012.html">Codrin Bălan</a> — Talks with Sarah back at home about what things will look like going forward (expand DMZ to idk like 1/3 system size, allow Artemisians to join, allow any to join Artemis as fifthrace). After Sarah leaves, goes for a walk with Dear, mentions what happened with AWNH and TN - 2136</li>
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<li class="done2"> <a href="local/tycho/015.html">Tycho Brahe</a> — The DMZ expands, sets up a border crossing of sorts, starts to think about what to do, about how there’s this idea that he invest fully that just showed up, fully formed, in his head - 1589</li>
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@ -13,13 +13,16 @@
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</header>
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<article class="content">
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<h1 id="codrin-balancastor-2346">Codrin Bălan#Castor — 2346</h1>
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<div class="codehilite"><pre><span></span><code><span class="err">Convergence T+1 day, 18 hours, 46 minutse</span>
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</code></pre></div>
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<p>While it wouldn’t have been totally true to call the celebration at Codrin’s return ‘wild’, it was certainly rambunctious in its own delightfully Dear way, with dozens of foxes scattering around the patio in a flurry of forking. Plenty of hugging and chatting and laughing and smiling.</p>
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<p>Ey’d been startled, in that half-doubled, roundabout way that an up-tree instance might feel, when ey merged down to find that True Name and Jonas had requested that Codrin#Assist stay at their compound rather than returning home except for a few hours around dinner. The fox’s excitement made more sense, knowing that.</p>
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<p>At least ey’d had the chance to pull the fox’s tail.</p>
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<p>Once it calmed down enough to do so, Dear dragged Codrin into the dining room, gesturing eagerly for Sarah to follow with. Their partner had a spread already laid out for them.</p>
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<p>They spent the next hour recounting, carefully, the events of the talks. Codrin had requested that Sarah not discuss the Odists’ reaction to skew until ey’d had the chance to do so one-on-one with Dear. They spoke instead in general terms, discussing the topics that had come up during the talks, and the final announcement that they’d be welcomed aboard as fifthrace.</p>
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<p><em>“What is the practical result of this decision?”</em></p>
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<p>“Well, the technical details are a bit beyond me,” Sarah said. “But the Artemisians and our own engineers are talking about how to let the DMZ grow in size to no more than a third of our total capacity. As many of them as want to join us within those limitations will be able to join us here. They will allow as many of us who wish to join them to do so, as well.”</p>
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<p>“Well, the technical details are a bit beyond me,” Sarah said. “But the Artemisians and our own engineers are talking about how to let the DMZ grow in size to some maximum capacity — maybe a third of what Castor has to offer. As many of them as want to join us within those limitations will be able to join us here. They will allow as many of us who wish to join them to do so, as well.”</p>
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<p>“We’ll also be exchanging our shared libraries of information,” Codrin added. “I think that transmission effort has already begun, actually. We’re getting an enormous dump of information from four societies, and then we’ll upload all of ours to them. It’s going to be a field day for librarians, I bet.”</p>
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<p>“Think you’ll join?” eir partner asked.</p>
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<p>Ey shrugged. “I’m not sure, actually. It sounds fun, but I’m not sure I’m the same Bălan who wanted to be a librarian all those years ago.”</p>
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<p>“I know. I just don’t know if the same is something I’d like to do. I’ve got some thoughts on directions I might head instead, though. I’ve been talking with Sarah about it, and will tackle it deliberately.”</p>
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<p>The fox nodded. <em>“Of course, my love. I would be surprised if you were anything but deliberate.”</em></p>
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<p>Ey laughed and bumped eir shoulder against its own. “Of course.”</p>
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<p><em>“This is all so delightfully exciting, is it not? I was worried at first that the drama would be too much. Aliens! Political summits in space! Imagine.”</em> The fox giggled. <em>“And it was dramatic, I suppose, but it has settled down into exciting. Aliens, yes, but boundless new knowledge. Political summits in space, yes, but also a mingling of societies that we could not possibly imagine.”</em></p>
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<p><em>“This is all so delightfully exciting, is it not? I was worried at first that the drama would be too much. Aliens! Political summits in space! Imagine.”</em> The fox giggled. <em>“And it was dramatic, I suppose, but it has settled down into exciting. Aliens, yes, but boundless new knowledge. Political summits in space, yes, but also a mingling of societies that we could not possibly comprehend.”</em></p>
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<p>Sarah laughed and raised her coffee mug. “To the proper amount of excitement.”</p>
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<p>Dear hoisted its own mug as thought it was some ale-filled tankard. <em>“Precisely, my dear!”</em></p>
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<p>Dear hoisted its own mug as thought it was an ale-filled tankard. <em>“Precisely, my dear!”</em></p>
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<p>Codrin smiled, sipping eir coffee as ey watched. <em>Proper amount of excitement, indeed.</em></p>
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<p>After Sarah left, the triad sat around the table, saying nothing, simply processing this new future that lay before them. It felt almost too large for Codrin to comprehend. Something new. Something enormous. Something that felt somehow larger than the launches. Those, at least, had the advantage of being something that ey could predict, a frame of reference. Society continued much as it had before, after all, hadn’t it? They had decamped from Legrange for the LVs and everything looked exactly the same, minus only the few friends who had not done so.</p>
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<p>This, though, held so many unknowns.</p>
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<p>They stood and walked out into the prairie, Codrin brushing eir fingertips across the tops of eir cairns as they walked. They made it past three before ey was able to open up.</p>
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<p>“You were right to warn me about True Name and Answers Will Not Help.”</p>
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<p>Dear tilted its head. <em>“I thought Why Ask Questions was the emissary.”</em></p>
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<p>Ey shook eir head. “They pulled some nonsense, I guess. Why Ask Questions was the delegate here on Castor, but they swapped in Answers Will Not Help for those who went to Artemis.”</p>
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<p>Ey shook eir head. “They pulled some nonsense. Why Ask Questions was the delegate here on Castor, but they swapped in Answers Will Not Help for those who went to Artemis.”</p>
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<p><em>“Because of course they did.”</em></p>
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<p>“I’d call it cheeky, but it was more distressing than anything.” Ey sighed. “They really didn’t do well with the time skew at all. When we first got there, Answers Will Not Help collapsed, and True Name was only just barely holding it together. Even when we were in a unison room — places where time skew was locked into…uh, consensus, I guess — they kept…well, they looked like Michelle. Alternating forms, exhausted, distracted.”</p>
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<p>The fox splayed its ears, nodding. <em>“I did not know how they would act, but I am not surprised that those memories would come home to roost. I am sorry for them. I am sorry that you had to experience that so directly. Did it negatively impact the discussion?”</em></p>
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<p>Ey thought back over the memories ey had been left with from Codrin#Emissary, frowning. “Not necessarily, though we didn’t learn as much as we had hoped, I think. Things just went poorly on their end. Very poorly.”</p>
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<p>Ey thought back over the memories ey had been left with from Codrin#Artemis, frowning. “Not necessarily, though we didn’t learn as much as we had hoped, I think. Things just went poorly on their end. Very poorly.”</p>
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<p>Dear waited em out.</p>
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<p>“Answers Will Not Help lost it. She quit.”</p>
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<p><em>“‘Lost it’?”</em></p>
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<p>Codrin leaned in to kiss them on the cheek, still working on catching eir breath. “Yes. Definitely hash browns.”</p>
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</article>
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<p>Page generated on 2022-01-12</p>
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<p>Page generated on 2022-01-16</p>
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<p>“About the convergence?”</p>
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<p>She shrugged, a subtle shifting of shadow. “That too, yes, but also, news from Legrange has been distressing. Much of the clade will be seeking…well, therapy.”</p>
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<p>He frowned up to the sky, unable to think of anything to say to that that would not be rude or patronizing.</p>
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<p>“Our cracks are showing,” the skunk continued in a far away voice. “Growth is colliding with eternal memory, and the cracks are showing.”</p>
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<p>“Our cracks are showing,” the skunk continued in a far-away voice. “Growth is colliding with eternal memory, and the cracks are showing.”</p>
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<p>He nodded, unsure of whether or not she could even see the gesture.</p>
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<p>“Turns out getting invited on a thousand year voyage with a bunch of aliens induces a whole lot of growth <em>really fast,</em>” she said, voice brightening. “So I will be dealing with that. But come, if I share any more of my weaknesses, I will lose all of my hard-won respect. How do you feel about how things went?”</p>
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<p>With that bit of humor, the walls were back up. The perfect self-deprecating comment brought back that tightly controlled voice, and he felt a sudden sense of…honor, perhaps? He felt lucky that he’d been able to see some more vulnerable side of her, and he quelled the voice within him shouting that that was all a stage play for his benefit.</p>
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<p>“I’m not totally sure, yet,” he admitted. “There was so much that I needed to deal with when I merged that it took me all day to do so, and I’m still trying to make sense of it all.”</p>
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<p>A slight rustle beside him indicated a nod from the skunk. “No kidding. You have seen how easily we fork and merge, so it might be telling that it took me nearly thirty minutes to even manage the merge from True Name#Artemis.”</p>
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<p>He winced. “I was wondering how that’d go.”</p>
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<p>“Rough,” she said after a moment. “As soon as I got back to Castor, I immediately felt better, but no less tired. My memories of my time aboard Artemis are only just barely coherent. They are fractured and scattered. I could tell a coherent story of our time there from start to finish, but much beyond that eludes me still.”</p>
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<p>“Rough,” she said after a moment. “As soon as I got back to Castor, I immediately felt better, but no less tired. My memories of my time aboard Artemis are only just barely coherent. They are fractured and scattered. I could tell a clear story of our time there from start to finish, but much beyond that eludes me still.”</p>
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<p>Tycho set aside his empty glass and stretched out on the grass, laying on his back once more, arms crossed beneath his head. “I was worried about that, yeah. I can’t speak to the ease of merging, but I’m glad you made it through all the same.”</p>
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<p>He could hear the grin in her voice as she said, “I am pleased to hear that. The distance between “we are coworkers and should act as such” and “I don’t actually like you but have to tolerate you” is rather small, and I could not tell which it was with you.”</p>
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<p>“I respect you,” he said, laughing at her easy humor. “You’re a little terrifying, but I respect you.”</p>
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<p>“How do you feel things went?”</p>
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<p>“As well as they could have,” she said, the answer coming readily. “The talks were peaceful, the instances of mutual incomprehension minimal, and the outcome amenable to both sides.”</p>
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<p>“I think I hear a ‘but’ coming.”</p>
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<p>He could see the shadow of her nod. “Yes. But also, there are some aspects of them that I personally do not understand, and that is uncomfortable to me. They say that they do not manage sentiment or use much in the way of subtlety, they say they do not steer, and I believe them in that this is usually the case for them, but I disagree with the assessment that their checklist was a matter of preparation. They had goals coming into this convergence, and while I am pleased that they largely aligned with ours, I am unnerved by the fact that they either do not understand the ways in which they steer or, more likely, refuse to admit such. The two failed convergences they only ever talked around show this quite well.”</p>
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<p>He could see the shadow of her nod. “Yes. But also, there are some aspects of them that I personally do not understand, and that is uncomfortable to me. They say that they do not manage sentiment or use much in the way of subtlety, they say they do not steer, and I believe them in that this is usually the case for them, but I disagree with the assessment that their checklist was a matter of preparation. They had goals coming into this convergence, and while I am pleased that they largely aligned with ours, I am unnerved by the fact that they either do not understand the ways in which they steer or, more likely, refuse to admit such. The two failed convergences they only ever talked around show this quite well. You have heard our thoughts on the utility of social pain in maintaining defense mechanisms, after all.”</p>
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<p>“Are you frustrated, perhaps?”</p>
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<p>There was a moment’s pause as the skunk shifted to lay down beside him, echoing his posture. “I suppose. Frustrated, a bit sad.”</p>
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<p>“Sad?”</p>
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<p>“Yeah, I think that’s a good bit of it. I’m finally looking forward to something. I’m finally eager, rather than just anxious.”</p>
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<p>She laughed, not unkindly. “I am happy for you, Dr. Brahe.”</p>
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<p>“Thank you.”</p>
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<p>“And have you any further thoughts on uploading as the stage of civilization most likely to breach the Great Filter?” She sounded earnest, almost excited. “I must confess that the thought has been lingering in the back of my mind since our last conversation here.”</p>
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<p>“I’m still feeling like I’m stuck in some crazy science fiction novel, if I’m honest,” he said. “Uploading, furries, launch vehicles, and now aliens? At this point, why not? It makes as much sense as any of this.”</p>
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<p>She chuckled. “Well said, my dear.”</p>
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<p>When next she spoke, True Name sounded almost as dreamy as he had, her voice holding the subtle cadence of a recitation. “Calmest coldness was the error which has crept into our life; But your spirit is untainted, I can dedicate you still To the service of our science: you will further it? You will!”</p>
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<p>He spent a moment searching the perisystem architecture for the poem True Name had been quoting from since he first met her, the one with the lines that he knew he would speak before he left, but was not yet ready to.</p>
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<p><em>That is a poem about death,</em> she had said, all those weeks — and yet so few! — ago, and as he prowled through the lines, he could see how it was that she had interpreted it, how she had seen in the words the danger of being left incomplete in one’s goals, of the risk of not being able to see something through to the end.</p>
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<p>He was nothing if not a scientist, though, and although her reading, as one who dreamed in her own ways, was as accurate as his, he knew he had his own understanding of leaving a work unfinished so that others could pick it up. That was his dream, the dream of so many calm, cold scientists before him. It was a different take on the same dream, perhaps; where True Name might see regret in that error of calmest coldness, he saw only the comforting truth of his later science.</p>
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<p>Or perhaps that coldness was her own, and for that he could not fault her regret, only wish her the best, only further his service to his science.</p>
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<p><em>We will dream of stars,</em> Stolon had said, and he knew they would.</p>
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