diff --git a/writing/poetry/mental-health.html b/writing/poetry/mental-health.html index e7c4a8443..208cb1b00 100644 --- a/writing/poetry/mental-health.html +++ b/writing/poetry/mental-health.html @@ -15,11 +15,11 @@

writing poetry mental-health

In Eigengrau

There is too much fire in me -to be described by the soldering iron's tip. +to be described by the soldering iron’s tip. If I were to draw that across my flesh, it would all spill out at once. -I'd melt, eaten whole by flames, +I’d melt, eaten whole by flames, and flow into a pool of molten silver. I would be borne up through the clouds, and grow lighter by the second. @@ -28,7 +28,7 @@ Sublimation would claim me then, All that energy poured to the air around me, an imperceptible increase in temperature. Particle would excite particle -   until I'm felt only as warmth on your face. +   until I’m felt only as warmth on your face. But even that would not be enough.

@@ -41,14 +41,14 @@ The shipping forecast! What a load of bollocks. You can listen from start to finish And not hear a single word about how a day will feel. -Or maybe it's a pale, tired, steganography: +Or maybe it’s a pale, tired, steganography: Moderate, becoming poor, violent storm 11. Burning up, drowning, torn by wind, and all I can manage is to tell you southwest gale 8 to storm 10. I can point at the moon, exhausted, bored, decaying, -And hope you don't stare blankly at my finger. +And hope you don’t stare blankly at my finger.

Thanks to P.R.


Bruise vision

@@ -250,20 +250,20 @@ Failing that,

First-place winner of the Typewriter Emergencies Poetry Contest.In Eigengrau

Beneath her coat was a whole identity: A subtle form of ideas under soft fur, -A constantly shifting mass of meaning... +A constantly shifting mass of meaning… And somehow, she pulled it off. She would go for days without shedding a thing, And then, as if a bottle rolling off a counter, She would shatter, sending shards of self flying, -And then we'd all see. +And then we’d all see. -Then we'd all see the terror, the joy, -Then we'd all see the grief at nothing, -Then we'd all hear her say, -"I'm not built for a life with death in it." +Then we’d all see the terror, the joy, +Then we’d all see the grief at nothing, +Then we’d all hear her say, +“I’m not built for a life with death in it.” -And slowly, she'd pick herself back up +And slowly, she’d pick herself back up And find a brand new way to piece herself together And build herself a brand new smile And brush out her coat once more.
@@ -293,7 +293,8 @@ Let time eat your memories of me: A final morsel to savor.

Rush

-

In Eigengrau

+

In Eigengrau +In ally

A flash of coppery sweetness, A clearing of the sinuses, A burst of unnamed colors, @@ -351,7 +352,7 @@ Down cycle Round and round