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Madison Scott-Clary 2023-10-27 11:20:11 -07:00
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<title>Zk | 008</title>
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<h1>Zk | 008</h1>
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<p>We sat around the table, saying nothing, but each doubtless thinking our own thoughts. The decision to pare down our dinner hadn&rsquo;t been made unilaterally, but in fits and starts. First, Rush bailed, saying that ve was too sleepy, that the night was coming on too quickly, it felt, with so much new information coming at ver too quickly.</p>
<p>Lily, of course, had stepped away almost immediately. Although she appeared to have made the decision to reconcile with Dry Grass, that didn&rsquo;t mean that she didn&rsquo;t have to put any work into it. She still had her anger, her resentment for what she felt that the Odists had done in their shaping of the System and its history, their role in Marsh uploading in the first place, and for that, I could hardly fault her. I had had my own feelings over the years that had lingered, that I had bathed in helplessly, struggling to escape the odd comforts of depression or angst or anger. I could hardly expect her to climb free immediately.</p>
<p>&ldquo;I do not blame her, either,&rdquo; Dry Grass had said shortly after she stepped away and I voiced these thoughts. &ldquo;It is not comfortable, to be clear. I do not like that she hates me. My role — the role of my whole stanza — is to revel in feelings of motherhood. I saw myself as mother to the System on a very real, very mechanical level, back when I was working as a syseng. To have a citizen of the very System I love hate me is perilously close to having a child hate me.&rdquo;</p>
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<p>Page generated on 2023-10-27</p>
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