diff --git a/writing/post-self/neviim/remote/tycho/005.html b/writing/post-self/neviim/remote/tycho/005.html index e3c72592b..2591d7e21 100644 --- a/writing/post-self/neviim/remote/tycho/005.html +++ b/writing/post-self/neviim/remote/tycho/005.html @@ -67,7 +67,7 @@

“Leader True Name, as leader of this delegation and member of the Council of Eight,” Turun Ka said, voice bearing the weight of ritual. “I would like to formally welcome you aboard Artemis as fifthrace.”

True Name stared at it, agog.

Turun Ko picked up from there, its speech suddenly free of doublings-back and duplicated words. “Recorder Codrin Bălan, as recorder of this delegation, I welcome you as a member of fifthrace aboard Artemis. The final step on our checklist was simply a desire to join.”

-

Stolon continued, proceeding down the line. “Ka, ka. Scientist Tycho Brahe, I am welcoming you as member of fifthrace aboard Artemis. We will dream of stars together.”

+

Stolon continued, proceeding down the line. They were bouncing on their feet, teeth chattering, clearly quite excited. “Ka, ka. Scientist Tycho Brahe, I am welcoming you as member of fifthrace aboard Artemis. We will dream of stars together.”

Tycho’s eyes burned as he stood, rigid, and listened to the series of formal declarations. All of the delegates looked overwhelmed, shocked.

“I am not able to speak to representative Why Ask– Answers Will Not Help, so I will speak to all. I welcome you as members of fifthrace aboard Artemis. We, as a society, look forward to learning of your arts.”

Artante was crying. Hell, he was crying.

@@ -89,7 +89,7 @@

“I have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night,” he finished, grinning. “That was the last thing I said to myself before uploading. It’ll be the last thing I’ll say before I leave Castor.”