Zk | Mitzvot

Wherein True Name and May reconcile, and we deal with the problem of the ownership of memory. 2350, Jonas’s choice.

Brief outline

• Ioan starts hanging with True Name. Just reading with at coffee shop while she does her own work
• May eventually gets to the point where she can relax around TN enough to talk cordially
• turning point comes when Jonas sends assassin after TN, tells May what Jonas is doing that’s leading to her being edged out
  • They run to Ioan’s, grab May, head to lake sim (now Arrowhead Lake, even though it’s kidney shaped, b/c May is a brat)
  • They set up a cone of silence
  • TN dully explains
  • May gasp, paws to snout, etc
  • Does Ioan know? Do we?
• May offers to merge down
  • Unclear feelings (a little bit vindictive, like she wants to prove TN’s way of life wrong, but also cracks in hate showing, empathy, respect even if don’t like)
  • Turns out she kinda lied, hasn’t done so in a century or w’evs
  • big conversation because then TN has memories of May being with Ioan
  • calls into question how much individuation is in effect when memories are from completely different personality type (conflicts)
• Ioan sends fork back to clear out house, lock down ACLs
• They do
  • TN forks in case it goes poorly
  • May forks and quits
  • original TN collapses, goes catatonic for a good 5 hours while processing
• Jonas arrives and explains just what it is he’s doing
  • With the impending change that allows A/V transmission between sys- and phys-side, he thinks that phys-side will expect a much more coherent experience sys-side
  • TN isn’t being made an example of because she’s TN, but because in the context of the History, she’s visible as an architect, and thus there needs to be a sense that leadership is malleable, especially in light of news from Castor
  • Besides, she’s kind of failing now, isn’t she? [cue shit-eating politician grin] He can assassinate her and she won’t do shit about it because that would risk the stability of Lagrange
  • He already has most of her stanza on his side.
• Meanwhile, May and Ioan have to process what it means that TN now has memories of their relationship
  • You have the memories, but not the mental framework required to process such (May is empathetic, which TN still struggles with, but now she has the memories, one type of conflict)
  • How much does individuation matter?
  • What will TN’s feelings for Ioan be?
  • How is ey expected to feel about her?
  • This should all be done very kind and open and good conversation because that’s how the Odists do. Perhaps Sarah involved?
• ???
• Profit
  • Second meeting with Jonas, Ioan as amanuensis once more.
    • He makes it plain that she’s the sacrifice in order to ensure stability
    • She can continue living, he’s not that cruel, just not as TN anymore (call back to Demma/Yared)
  • She works with May to change (into ???) both physically and emotionally, changes name to When I Dream? Or drops out of the clade a la Qoheleth?

Caduceus

• Goal/Agenda
  • TN: continue work on stability, even though it’s costing her, because that’s just What She Does.
  • May: get all the better at loving Ioan, also working with em on writing a monologue for herself.
  • Ioan: get all the better at loving May, adapting Perils for stage
• Meet Cute
  • Probably Ioan/May and Ioan/TN talking about how they each talk about each other a lot
• No way 1
  • Another talk with each:
    • May is still pretty resentful of TN
    • TN is still focused on her calling
• Stuck together
  • Assassination attempt forces them together
• No way 2
  • May pretty upset about the situation
  • TN too wrapped up in trying to figure out how to salvage this
• Bone town
  • TN talks about Jonas w/ May
  • May comes up with idea for merging down
• Seed of doubt
  • Wallow 1
    • May secretly in communication with EW, maybe still resenting TN, so she kind of wants him to merge down to shock her
    • TN moping about how things have wound up re: her calling
  • Retreat
    • EW merges down
    • TN gains perspective from others, recoils
    • Ioan feels icky about TN having May’s memories of them together
  • Choose fear
    • TN says she can’t deal, pulls back from both May and Ioan, stays at Arrowhead lake with new camping knowledge
    • May overflows (just a few days), claims the home
    • Ioan really struggling with the idea of May merging, but also really wants to help, but now May’s gone, goes to stay with Douglas
  • Wallow 2
    • May feels bad because she can’t help, starting to think that maybe Ioan’s right: it’s not fair to them as a couple for TN to have those memories
    • TN’s really struggling
    • Ioan’s crushed at the timing of May overflowing and TN requesting time to herself, while ey’s the only one getting both sides, has at least one sensorium conversation with each
• Choose love
  • Ioan thinks aloud: “Hey, TN won’t just have May’s memories wholesale, she’ll have a synthesis of herself, May, and now EW”
  • May agrees, thinks that knowing love is only ever going to be a good thing for TN, and memories of her resentment will open everything up
  • TN realizes that changing is probably the only real way out of all of this, and really? That’s not so bad.
• Plan/risk
  • I don’t like this being separate, so I think they all agree on this.
  • They all return home, where May helps TN set up a nest to process (way easier than with EW), Ioan lays in supplies to help out, TN negotiates boundaries and how they’ll likely shift in the process.
• Grand gesture
  • May merges down
  • Decision to individuate/change of name
    • Change name to When I Dream
    • Change pronouns to they/them (rather likes the plurality involved, still feels that strongly with May and EW being so different from her)
    • Appearance change, maybe white fur a la Dear? Shrug? Probably has to stay a skunk b/c she’s now three in one. Gotta be something.
• Payoff
  • When I Dream works on finding a new purpose
• Epilogue
  • Depending on how gay I’m feeling, they might:
    • Live together
    • Wind up in a relationship
    • Simply part ways for WID to find her way in the world with May dropping her hatred

Subplots

• Codrin#Castor
  • Life in Convergence
• Codrin#Pollux
  • Dear’s partner has left on a relationship sabbatical, just Dear, Codrin, and now Serene
• Sorina
  • Life on Artemis
  • Working as student psych w/ Sarah, Artante, 1racer Anin Li

Notes

• Dear laughed. “The very thing that keeps me from being anything other than a dispersionista. Jealousy is a sign of needs not met, and one of my needs — one of the clade’s needs — is that of ownership over memory. I would be furious if Praiseworthy asked me to merge with her.”

  Why May wouldn’t have merged, but then her need to be the world’s best skonk to someone she can help becomes a need

• Oh no, this is going to turn into a book, isn’t it

• The Crux really is about the ownership of memory, because if May merges down, her memories of being in love with Ioan will be available to TN (act II/III)
  • Qoheleth - origins, the problem of memory
  • Toledot - structure, politics in an ungovernable system, set up TN
  • Nevi’im - time, Michelle’s madness coming home to roost, TN knocked down a peg, divergence
  • (Reconciliation) - ownership of memory
• TN turning into the sacrificial lamb to keep news from castor smooth. Not that she isn’t willing to keep things stable, but this in combination with Jonas using her sucks (inciting incident)
• Intersperse letters from LVs and Artemis
• Cones of silence have ACLs, usually block sensorium messages from all but direct forks - renewed dev on System as they get extra-System A/V transmission running, new feature is blacking out cone from the outside.
• Jonas knows he can assassinate TN b/c she won’t risk stability of Lagrange, already has most of her stanza on his side, minus EW and May
• Jonas in third act meets up with TN w/ Ioan as Amanuensis once more, makes plain that she’s to be the sacrifice, will let her root instance live but not as TN anymore.
• Bring back furry qua furry
• Will A/V change the dynamic to rather than dying a natural death, you just upload? You watch your kids grow up and succeed and then they come join you? I think Jonas will pretty transparently not care, but TN cares desperately, esp after EW merges down

Outline

• Epigraph
  • Numbers 15:31: (the being cut off part is good, but this equates jonas to god, so???)
    • NRSV: Because of having despised the word of the Lord and broken his commandment, such a person shall be utterly cut off and bear the guilt.
    • Sefaria: Because it was the word of יהוה that was spurned and [God’s] commandment that was violated, that person shall be cut off—and bears the guilt.
    • Alter: For he has spurned the word of the Lord and His commandment he has violated. That person shall surely be cut off, his crime is upon him.
  • Exodus 23:7: (bit heavy handed wrt TN)
    • NRSV: Keep far from a false charge, and do not kill the innocent and those in the right, for I will not acquit the guilty.
    • Sefaria: Keep far from a false charge; do not bring death on those who are innocent and in the right, for I will not acquit the wrongdoer.
    • Alter: From a lying word stay far away, and the guiltless and innocent do not kill, for I will not acquit the guilty.
  • Deuteronomy 23:22-24: (pretty long, but I like the “refrain from vowing” bit)
    • NRSV (21-23): If you make a vow to the Lord your God, do not postpone fulfilling it; for the Lord your God will surely require it of you, and you would incur guilt. But if you refrain from vowing, you will not incur guilt. Whatever your lips utter you must diligently perform, just as you have freely vowed to the Lord your God with your own mouth.
    • Sefaria: When you make a vow to your God יהוה, do not put off fulfilling it, for your God יהוה will require it of you, and you will have incurred guilt; whereas you incur no guilt if you refrain from vowing. You must fulfill what has crossed your lips and perform what you have voluntarily vowed to your God יהוה, having made the promise with your own mouth.
    • Alter: Should you make a fow to the Lord your God, you shall not delay fulfilling it, for the Lord your God will surely require it of you and there would be an offense in you. And you should refrain from making a vow, there will be no offense in you. The utterance of your lips you shall keep, and you shall do as you have vowed in the Lord your God, the freewill gift that you spoke with your mouth.
• Conversation — Ioan’s been hanging out with TN, May is actively working on letting go, and has gotten to the point of being cordial, polite, occasionally kind
  • Ioan — Ioan and TN get coffee, which they’ve been doing about once a month or so for a few years now.
  • Sorina — Sorina writes Ioan directly.
• Conflict — After assassination attempt on TN, learn about TN getting pushed out by Jonas, May offers to merge down, turns into big discussion
• Reconciliation — After the merge and TN’s collapse, she has to process two centuries of memories while Ioan and May have to process the results of the merge