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<h1>Zk | 006</h1>
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<p>date: 2019-08-16
weight: 6</p>
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<p>A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up.</p>
<p>My interest in furry wound down a bit in university. I&rsquo;d burned myself a bit too hard, hurt too many people, grew too jaded to take part. I still prowled around the usual haunts on the MUCKs, still poked my head in FFF, still looked at all the art, <a href="https://adjectivespecies.com/2012/03/21/makyos-kaddish/">but my heart wasn&rsquo;t in it anymore</a>.</p>
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<p>There was a reason behind this. There were people behind this.</p>
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<p>Well, true. I don&rsquo;t know how to square that with&hellip;well, a lot of things.</p>
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<p>You don&rsquo;t know how to square that with how you felt about those people at the time.</p>
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<p>That&rsquo;s one aspect, yes. I also don&rsquo;t know how to square that with the fact that I was growing too jaded in a lot more than just furry. I grew jaded at school. I grew jaded at work. I struggled with my relationships. I struggled.</p>
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<p>You struggled with gender.</p>
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<p>Well, yes, but I wasn&rsquo;t quite ready to admit that, yet.</p>
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<p>You struggled with self harm.</p>
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<p>Yes.</p>
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<p>You struggled with the intersections, the interstices, and the liminal spaces.</p>
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<p>I was going to write about [a][s]. Where are you taking me?</p>
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<p>Straight homeward to your symbol-essences.</p>
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<p>Shall I not die, then?</p>
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<p>Isn&rsquo;t that the point of writing?</p>
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<p>I&rsquo;m pretty sure all our names are writ on water at this point.</p>
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<p>Come now. You wanted to be Keats when you grew up.</p>
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<p>You&rsquo;re in a mood.</p>
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<p>You&rsquo;re in a mood.</p>
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<p>Fine.</p>
<p>Where are you taking me?</p>
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<p>Let [a][s] speak for [a][s]. Let yourself speak for yourself.</p>
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<p><a class="pulse" href="/furry/margaras">Okay</a>.</p>
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<p>Page generated on 2020-06-24</p>
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