77 lines
7.4 KiB
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77 lines
7.4 KiB
HTML
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<h1>Zk | 037</h1>
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<h1 id="ioan-balan-2350">Ioan Bălan — 2350</h1>
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<p>((Ioan and Sasha go for a walk))</p>
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<p>“How long do you think you’ll stay?”</p>
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<p>“I am too much myself to say ‘forever’, but as long as my room is there, as long as you and May are comfortable with me being a part of your lives, I will be happy to call it home. Or at least <em>a</em> home.”</p>
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<p>“Really? No bigger and brighter things?”</p>
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<p>She laughed and leaned over to dot her nose on eir cheek. “This <em>is</em> bigger and brighter things, my dear.”</p>
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<p>“Well, I’m sure we’ll talk about it plenty, but I see no reason not to keep your room about. I don’t know what you overflowing will look like, but if it involves one third solitude and one third getting lost walking sims, I don’t imagine you’ll be around all the time.”</p>
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<p>“Not at all, no. I will spend my share of time here to be alone or out walking the world. Perhaps I will even ask you to double the rest of the house so that I can be alone somewhere domestic, not just the wild.”</p>
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<p>“Of course.” Ey shrugged, tossing one of eir collected pebbles into the lake. “Besides, I like having you around.”</p>
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<p>“I am pleased to hear that. I had gathered such, but all the same, I would not want to be a bother.”</p>
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<p>“Oh, not at all. It seems like we’re all pretty good at sorting things out when they do come up, so I don’t imagine it’ll get to that point.”</p>
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<p>“And I am not impinging too much on your and May’s relationship?” she asked, holding out her paw for one of eir pebbles. “I am asking her, too, and we will continue to talk together, but I also want to you directly.”</p>
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<p>Ey shrugged, handing over the pebble. “I don’t think so. So long as we can still have time to ourselves when we need, I’ll be happy.”</p>
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<p>She tossed the pebble out into the water. “Of course, dear.”</p>
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<p>They sat in quiet for a while, tossing pebbles into the water until ey ran out.</p>
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<p>“Hey Sasha?”</p>
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<p>“Mm?”</p>
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<p>“Do you miss anything from before all this?”</p>
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<p>She shrugged. “It is hard to tell. As I have said, I liked being True Name. It was fulfilling. Every time I think about that now, though, it is intercut with memories from my cocladists. I will think about some particularly adroit political move and remember it fondly, but right along with it is a memory of giving up on using a bow drill and switching to using a striker or making fun of you for your pen collection.”</p>
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<p>Ey laughed.</p>
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<p>“If I am honest, I am letting a few conflicts remain. There is something pleasant about the just-off-center nature of that reality. I am Sasha, and I am also True Name, End Waking, and May. I am of three minds.”</p>
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<p>“So long as that works for you.”</p>
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<p>“I can always address them down the line if it does not.”</p>
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<p>Ey nodded. “And I’m guessing you don’t miss Jonas or Zacharias or any of that.”</p>
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<p>She poked at eir side with a claw before slouching against eir side. “You do not need to ask stupid questions, Ioan.”</p>
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<p>“Right, right,” ey said, laughing. “I figured no love lost, but–“</p>
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<p>“I did not love either of them, as friends or otherwise,” she said, waving away the rest of eir comment. “Now that I have known other kinds of love, I am confident of that.”</p>
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<p>Her tone wasn’t upset or dismissive, but was assertive enough that ey dropped the point. “Well, writing sounds like a good career shift, then.”</p>
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<p>“Says the writer.” She laughed. “But yes. I will be leaning on you a lot for help.”</p>
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<p>“I mean, you’re leaning now.”</p>
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<p>“Smartass,” she said mildly.</p>
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<p>Ey grinned. “I mean, no complaints. Still sort of getting used to it, but May got me hooked on physical contact a long time ago.”</p>
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<p>“A coordinated attack on your defenses, yes,” she said. “It makes my job easier.”</p>
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<p>“What job?” ey asked, frowning.</p>
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<p>“Just finding a way to stick around friends. Nothing nefarious, dear.”</p>
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<p>Ey shook eir head. “Right, sorry. I trust you.”</p>
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<p>“I agree with what May said, Ioan. Should I want anything beyond that, I will come by it earnestly.”</p>
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<p>“I appreciate that.” Ey hugged an arm around her. Ey was grateful for her looking out at the lake rather than at em, given the heat ey could feel rising to eir cheeks. “While we’re being honest, though, I think we’re sort of in the same boat, honestly, given what you share with May. We can both imagine that, but not necessarily the path from here to there.”</p>
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<p>“Precisely. I imagine the same applies to you, that you will come by it honestly.”</p>
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<p>Ey nodded. “Basically. Is it something you’d want?”</p>
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<p>“God, I have no fucking clue, Ioan,” she said, laughing.</p>
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<p>“Definitely same boat, then. It’s a problem for future Ioan.”</p>
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<p>They fell into silence again. Part of em was itching for more pebbles to toss into the water, but ey was too comfortable to get up to collect more from the beach.</p>
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<p>“That is the conflict I left from May,” Sasha murmured. “I kept some doubt from End Waking, enough to keep me grounded without keeping me torn. From May, I am keeping a little bit of confusion around emotions. The possibility of simply falling for everyone around me is alluring. I can taste it in the memories, like a little bit of saccharine. But I am keeping a little bit of doubt from True Name so that it remains a new thing for me. <em>I am of three minds Like a tree In which there are three blackbirds.</em>“</p>
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<p>Ey turned her words over in eir mind. The thought was complete. Nothing ey could respond with would add to it. It was curious, and hinted at things beyond eir ken, but it was complete.</p>
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<p>Instead, ey said, “You’re a good person, Sasha. All three of you are good people.”</p>
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<p>She laughed. “And you, dear, are a dork. But come, my tail is falling asleep, and my fork’s conversation with May has wrapped up.”</p>
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<p>They walked back, then, hand in paw, following the trail as it dipped down to the water or ducked up into the trees. Back home, back to May, back to whatever it was that life had become.</p>
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<p>Page generated on 2022-05-10</p>
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