31 lines
1.4 KiB
Markdown
31 lines
1.4 KiB
Markdown
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date: 2019-09-25
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weight: 4
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---
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> Do you enjoy vanilla sex, then?
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Perhaps. I suppose I must. So much of what I did for so long, online and off, was vanilla. Even now, much of it is.
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> Yet "sneps are for abusing".
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Yes.
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> Why?
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I enjoy vanilla sex. It feels good. All this kink, though, helps me grow. It's exposure therapy.
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It was exposure therapy when a TS partner on Taps laughed in my face as he raped me and left me to clean myself up. It is exposure therapy because I can say no, because I can enjoy being tied up now.
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It was exposure therapy when I was ordered to describe what I wanted in lurid detail. It's exposure therapy because I can talk about sex now.
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It was exposure therapy when I entered into a few master/pet relationships. It's exposure therapy because at some point I was able to handle a power-dynamic in my relationships.
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It was exposure therapy when I spent scene after scene toying with fertility. It's exposure therapy because at some point I was able to deal with the idea of not being cis, of motherhood being unattainable.
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It was exposure therapy when I made my character a pudgy nerd and still able to engage with her sexually. It's exposure therapy because I've been able to come to terms with my body.
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> It's exposure therapy because at some point, you started enjoying sex --- or at least enjoying it more --- and the thought of sharing that with someone.
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Yes.
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