update from sparkleup

writing/post-self/mitzvot/034.md

@@ -12,7 +12,7 @@ Doubtless Jonas knew of eir distaste, as well, and doubtless this had factored i
 
 Ey stopped by the bar to get a cider of some sort --- something sweet; ey didn't know the first thing about ciders --- and hunted down an empty booth. The backs of the benches were straight and high, reaching up to the ceiling, leading to a secluded, if not particularly comfortable, space. There, ey sat and sipped eir way slowly through eir cider, waiting for Jonas.
 
-Ey'd shown up, notebook in hand, half an hour early and was half expecting Jonas to be late, sauntering in lazily at quarter past, just as some strange show of power, but he arrived right on time, picked up a drink from the bar, and hunted Ioan down. Ey began to stand to bow to Jonas, then froze. Zacharias stepped into the sim, as well, grinned widely at the sight of Ioan mid-bow and, before even making his way to the table, gave an exaggerated curtsey.
+Ey'd shown up, notebook in hand, half an hour early and was half expecting Jonas to be late, sauntering in lazily at quarter past, just as some strange show of power, but he arrived right on time, picked up a drink from the bar, and hunted Ioan down. Ey began to stand to bow to Jonas, then froze. Zacharias stepped into the sim, as well, grinned widely at the sight of Ioan mid-bow. Before even making his way to the table, gave an exaggerated curtsey.
 
 "Ioan, wonderful to see you again," Jonas said, grinning. "My most foppish lackey decided to tag along, I trust you won't mind."
 
@@ -38,21 +38,21 @@ The fox sat, frozen, for a moment longer before wiping up some of his spilled dr
 
 Mid-sip, Jonas waved his hand vaguely. "Of course, of course," he said, setting his glass back down. "Whenever you're ready, like I said. But come, how are you Ioan? You look tired."
 
-Ey stared at him, trying to piece together how worth it was to actually answer the question. Ey *was* tired, yes. The night before had been a stressful one once ey'd received the request for a meeting from Jonas. True Name stayed up late in conversation with both May and End Waking about some clade business ey'd not been privy to, leading to em pacing in the darkened yard for nearly an hour, spring lilacs leaving the air almost too heady to breathe. Ey'd eventually given up on waiting for the skunks. Ey knew if ey stayed up any later, ey'd simply wind up standing at the windows and watching their fire out on the plain.
+Ey stared at him, trying to piece together how worth it was to actually answer the question. Ey *was* tired, yes. The night before had been a stressful one once ey'd received the request for a meeting from Jonas. True Name stayed up late in conversation with both May and End Waking about some clade business ey'd not been privy to, leading to em pacing in the darkened yard for nearly an hour, spring lilacs leaving the air almost too thick to breathe. Ey'd eventually given up on waiting for the skunks. Ey knew if ey stayed up any later, ey'd simply wind up standing at the windows and watching their fire out on the plain.
 
-*"I think I'm going to head to bed,"* ey sent May. *"I'm just going to keep cycling if I stay up."*
+*"I think I'm going to head to bed,"* ey had sent May. *"I'm just going to keep cycling if I stay up."*
 
 There was a hint of a whine to her reply. *"I am sorry, Ioan, I did not realize how late it had gotten. Do you want me to send a fork back?"*
 
 *"I don't know, will they be intolerable and antsy?"*
 
-*"Oh, absolutely,"* she replied, and ey could hear the grin in her voice. *"But I will still send one if you would like."*
+*"Oh, absolutely,"* she had replied, and ey could hear the grin in her voice. *"But I will still send one if you would like."*
 
 *"No, no. It's alright. Just no sleeping out there, okay?"*
 
 *"Of course. We will return soon."*
 
-It was nearly two hours later when the skunks returned as promised. Two hours of tossing and turning in bed, fretting and fretting and fretting. Eventually, they fell into their usual positions, though despite the added rest that this usually brought True Name, none of them slept well.
+It was nearly two hours later when the skunks had returned as promised. Two hours of tossing and turning in bed, fretting and fretting and fretting. Eventually, they had fallen into their usual positions, though despite the added rest that this usually brought True Name, none of them had slept well.
 
 When there was no wink and smile from Jonas, ey let eir shoulders sag and nodded. "Tired, yeah. We're all tired. Just want this shit over with."
 
@@ -60,7 +60,7 @@ When there was no wink and smile from Jonas, ey let eir shoulders sag and nodded
 
 "Look, Jonas, what are you after? We're tired. She's upset. We just want to get on with our lives, and it's all on you."
 
-"Well, sure, but now my workload's doubled," he said, and there, at last was the wink. "Though in all seriousness, I'm just trying to gauge what to expect. May Then My Name and End Waking will be there, too, right?"
+"Well, sure, but now my workload's doubled," he said, and there at last was the wink. "Though in all seriousness, I'm just trying to gauge what to expect. May Then My Name and End Waking will be there, too, right?"
 
 "Yes," ey said coolly, adding to Zacharias, "Will you?"
 
@@ -116,13 +116,13 @@ Zacharias frowned, but Jonas was already nodding, "Got it in one. That's right a
 
 "Right. The direction that we need to take with Lagrange can't just be the same old one we've been taking before. In this, True Name and I disagreed." He shrugged, rocking his glass gently back and forth on the table before taking another sip. "She wanted continue on her path of subtlety, I disagreed."
 
-"Disagreed? You tried to assassinate her, Jonas."
+Ey snorted. "Disagreed? You tried to assassinate her, Jonas."
 
-He shrugged. "What are bullets but a disagreement?"
+"What are bullets but a disagreement?"
 
 Ioan rolled eir eyes.
 
-"We disagree, then. It's like I said, though, sometimes mommies and daddies fight, Ioan. We've spent the past few years trying to hash it out. For all her focus on subtlety in guiding the system, she can be a real bitch when it comes to trying to get her point across."
+"You and I disagree, then. It's like I said, though, sometimes mommies and daddies fight, Ioan. We've spent the past few years trying to hash it out. For all her focus on subtlety in guiding the System, she can be a real bitch when it comes to trying to get her point across."
 
 "Bullshit," ey said flatly.
 
@@ -138,7 +138,7 @@ Jonas was back to grinning. "Oh, fuck off, Ioan. I'm not going to tell you all o
 
 Ey gave a hint of a bow. "As you say. It's settled, then, right? Two days, 11:00?"
 
-"That it is. Bring your pen and paper," Jonas said, lifting his glass in another toast before downing his drink in one go.
+"That it is. Bring your pen and paper," Jonas said, lifting his glass in a final toast before downing his drink in one go.
 
 "Right."
 
@@ -146,13 +146,13 @@ Ey didn't hear if there was a reply or not. Ey simply quit. #Tracker could take
 
 Ioan#Tracker set eir pen down with exaggerated care, closing eir notebook, then eir eyes. This was anger in so many ways, though it differed from that hot, spiky shape spinning within em that came with Zacharias's bullshit. It was a pressure within eir chest, a tension in eir shoulders, a pounding in eir head. 
 
-"*Fuck,*" ey shouted. Ey fell back into the paced breathing exercises that Sarah had showed em years ago. It had been in the context to help May, at the time, but ey needed anything ey could get, now.
+"*Fuck!*" ey shouted. Ey fell back into the paced breathing exercises that Sarah had showed em years ago. It had originally been in the context of helping May, at the time, but ey needed anything ey could get, now.
 
-"*I take it you are back, then?*" May's words over the sensorium message were tentative, anxious. Clearly everyone's tension was still lingering.
+"*I take it you are back, then?*" May's words over the sensorium message were tentative, anxious. Clearly tension was still high.
 
 "*Yes. I'm coming outside,*" ey replied.
 
-Ey didn't wait for the ping of acknowledgement. Even if they weren't ready for em to be out there, ey needed to pass at least something on. Ey needed to be around eir partner and friends. Ey needed to be out of that context, away from pens and paper and books and work.
+Ey didn't wait for the ping of acknowledgement. Even if they weren't ready for em to be out there, ey needed to talk at least a little, get some of the weight of the conversation off eir shoulders. Ey needed to be around eir partner and friends. Ey needed to be out of that context, away from pens and paper and books and work.
 
 The afternoon was settling into evening, and the plain was littered with dozens of skunks. As ey walked toward True Name's tent, though, they began to quit in small groups until it was just the three root instances kneeling around a small fire, over which they were roasting sausages.
 
@@ -166,7 +166,7 @@ End Waking used the tip of his knife to nudge at a few of the sausages, turning
 
 Dinner was quiet, but not unpleasant. Gentle wind through the grass, the crackling of the fire and the spit of grease from the sausages, the gamy tang of ground venison tempered with barley and herbs. 
 
-"Did he wind you up that badly?" May asked.
+"Did he wind you up that badly?" May asked once they'd finished.
 
 "Well, yes and no. He and Zacharias were both there."
 
@@ -188,7 +188,7 @@ Ey nodded. "I'd guessed that much, at least. I think the whole meeting was a for
 
 True Name winced and averted her gaze. "I am sorry, Mx. Bălan."
 
-"Shit, I'm sorry." Ey reached over to give the skunk's paw a squeeze. "That was a different you, I'm not trying to put that on you now."
+"Shit, I'm sorry." Ey reached over to give the skunk's paw a squeeze. "That was a different time, I'm not trying to put that on you now."
 
 She patted the back of eir hand with her other paw, a somewhat stiff gesture, and, as always when the topic of strife in the past came up, ey could see more of End Waking in her than True Name or May. "Thank you, Ioan. I do appreciate it. It is an unfortunate reality that politics is the science of yanking people around. Add in being an actor, and, well," she said, then shrugged.
 
@@ -230,9 +230,9 @@ May laughed. "Well, yes. I will be happy for her and will continue loving you."
 
 "See? Gross." She laughed and hugged tighter around eir middle. "Will you let her continue to live here?"
 
-Shrugging carefully, ey murmured, "It'll be a conversation between the three of us. I've gotten used to it, I'd love to have her stick around if she wants."
+Shrugging carefully, ey murmured, "It'll be a conversation between the three of us. I've gotten used to it, so I'm happy to have her stick around if she wants."
 
-"Same," the skunk mumbled. "It is not perfect, but nothing that cannot be fixed by modifying the sim and nailing down some boundaries."
+"Same," the skunk said. "It is not perfect, but nothing that cannot be fixed by modifying the sim and nailing down some boundaries."
 
 "I'm looking forward to getting in touch with Serene, yeah." Ey hesitated, then asked gently, "Are there boundaries she's crossed?"
 
@@ -248,7 +248,7 @@ She sat up in eir lap and poked em in the chest with a dull claw. "Rude."
 
 Ey grinned. "Well, okay, not stress-shedding, just normal shedding."
 
-She scrubbed a paw at her flank until she came up little bit of shed fur --- 'skunk pixels', she'd called it at one point, and it had stuck --- to sprinkle over eir front. "Yes, yes. But I can say the same for you, my dear. A year ago, I do not think I could have pictured her giving you a goodnight kiss."
+She scrubbed a paw at her flank until she came up little bit of shed fur --- 'skunk pixels', she'd called it at one point, and the name had stuck --- to sprinkle over eir front. "Yes, yes. But I can say the same for you, my dear. A year ago, I do not think I could have pictured her giving you a goodnight kiss."
 
 Covering for the heat rising to eir cheeks by brushing the errant fur off eir front, ey shrugged. "I'm used to skunks being all touchy, thanks to you."
 
@@ -260,7 +260,7 @@ She grinned, nodding. "Agreed, yes. And you are okay with it?"
 
 Ey shrugged. "Like I said, I'm used to it. It occasionally strikes me as incredibly strange. Even just talking about it now feels weird. There's this whole, dramatic plot to take out one of the most prominent people on the System, and here we are, talking about goodnight kisses."
 
-"It is not that weird. It is an artifact of our lives. Death has a different flavor to it when we fork and quit on a whim, living for centuries at a time." She set to work brushing her fingers through eir hair. Weird to be petted, but it felt good, so ey never stopped her. She continued, "Which is not to say that it is important and anxiety inducing to have almost lost one's life, just that, with a modicum of care, she *can* continue living, even if in a restricted fashion. With less fear of death comes greater love."
+"It is not that weird. It is an artifact of our lives. Death has a different flavor to it when we fork and quit on a whim, living for centuries at a time." She set to work brushing her fingers through eir hair. Weird to be petted, but it felt good, so ey never stopped her. She continued, "Which is not to say that it is important and anxiety inducing to have almost lost one's life, just that, with a modicum of care, she *can* continue living, if in a restricted fashion even if she were to miss the deadline. With less fear of death comes greater love."
 
 Eyes closed and chin tucked nearly to eir chest, ey hummed thoughtfully. "I suppose, yeah. I didn't have much life outside the System that I can compare, never mind love."
 
@@ -274,7 +274,7 @@ Ey laughed and poked at her side a few times, hunting for a ticklish spot. "Who'
 
 Giggling helplessly, May squirmed until she tipped off eir lap, curling protectively into a ball. "It is just so easy, Ionuț, do not blame me!"
 
-"I know, I know, and it's your job as an Odist to fuck with me, *et cetera, et cetera*," ey said, sipping down into bed alongside the skunk, getting eir arms around her. "I like her, but...well, whatever. It's complicated."
+"I know, I know, and it's your job as an Odist to fuck with me, *et cetera, et cetera*," ey said, slipping down into bed alongside the skunk, getting eir arms around her. "I like her, but...well, whatever. It's complicated."
 
 She twisted in eir arms and wormed her way back against em, shaking her head. "No, you cannot just leave it at that. You have further thoughts and I want to hear."
 
@@ -282,7 +282,7 @@ She twisted in eir arms and wormed her way back against em, shaking her head. "N
 
 "Well, yes, but I do still want to hear."
 
-Ey sighed. "Fine, fine. I just...well, I guess I'm sort of in the same boat as her, in that it's something I can picture, even if I can't understand it. She's enough like you --- in terms of looks and voice as well as personality from the merge --- that I can imagine what that'd be like, and both she and End Waking are my friends, so there's that, too. But the context of her being True Name makes it hard to picture the...I don't know. Process?"
+Ey sighed. "Fine, fine. I just...well, I guess I'm sort of in the same boat as her, in that it's something I can picture, even if I can't understand it. She's enough like you --- in terms of looks and voice and now personality from the merge --- that I can imagine what that'd be like, and both she and End Waking are my friends, so there's that, too. But the context of her being True Name makes it hard to picture the...I don't know. Process?"
 
 "The concept versus the mechanics, maybe?"
 
@@ -294,4 +294,4 @@ Ey sighed. "Fine, fine. I just...well, I guess I'm sort of in the same boat as h
 
 She hugged eir arm to her front and nodded. "Well, whatever happens, happens. We will talk about it."
 
-"Another time," ey mumbled, pushing eir face into her soft fur. "I can't imagine I'm going to be able to sleep tomorrow night, so we might as well get some tonight."
+"Another time," ey mumbled, pushing eir face into her soft fur, coarser guard hairs tickling eir cheeks. "I can't imagine I'm going to be able to sleep tomorrow night, so we might as well get some tonight."