update from sparkleup

writing/post-self/toledot/launch/launch/Codrin-pollux/004.md

@@ -56,7 +56,7 @@ Dear's partner shrugged. "We just need to get one of those loose clamps for hold
 
 *"Do you promise?* I *promise that I will do all in my power to deserve it,"* it said, grinning wickedly.
 
-"Dear, I swear to god."
+"Dear, I swear to God."
 
 *"If you threaten me with a good time, you will win precisely the prize that you deserve."*
 
@@ -100,7 +100,7 @@ The fox gave a hint of a bow. *"Thank you in indulging me in this, Codrin. I can
 
 Dear tilted its head inquisitively.
 
-"Ezekiel talked about a Jonah. Is that someone else."
+"Ezekiel talked about a Jonah. Is that someone else?"
 
 *"Oh, yes. Same person. Jonah is a name that fits Ezekiel's current mode of thinking better, I suppose. We were all there, along with our phys-side accomplice in the campaign for secession and the L<sub>5</sub> launch, Yared.*
 
@@ -116,7 +116,7 @@ Dear tilted its head inquisitively.
 
 "So, after all of the celebrations died down, was there any real change?"
 
-Dear shrugged. *"Some residual excitement, I suppose. There were some little things that lingered, however, and stuck around. Secession Day, of course, but that is the date that we started using systime in earnest. The actual number chosen as year zero, day zero for systime is a bit more than a year before Secession, and was tied to the creation of the reputation market, such that there was always a time to which it could be synchronized. Before Secession, we still commonly used the calendar they were --- and presumably still are --- using phys-side, but after, almost everyone switched to using systime. It made logical sense, yes, what with sims not being tied to any particular schedule bound by Earth's rotation or procession around the Sun, but also it felt like a sign that we were becoming our own nation, our own people."*
+Dear shrugged. *"Some residual excitement, I suppose. There were some little things that lingered, however, and stuck around. Secession Day, of course, but that is also the date that we started using systime in earnest. The actual number chosen as year zero, day zero for systime is a bit more than a year before Secession, and was tied to the creation of the reputation market, such that there was always a time to which it could be synchronized. Before Secession, we still commonly used the calendar they were --- and presumably still are --- using phys-side, but after, almost everyone switched to using systime. It made logical sense, yes, what with sims not being tied to any particular schedule bound by Earth's rotation or procession around the Sun, but also it felt like a sign that we were becoming our own nation, our own people."*
 
 The table grew quiet after this explanation, as the last bite of pie was eaten and the last fry dipped in the last bit of shake.
 
@@ -128,9 +128,9 @@ Ey nodded, waiting for the fox to continue.
 
 *"Actually, my dear, can you guess? I am one who plays with instances, who finds ways to make others mad and happy and fall in love and get in fights, who guides and shapes sentiments, all by just being myself, and I am one who has turned that into an art."*
 
-"I know I've met Praiseworthy, but I don't know much about her. I know Serene built the house. I think you mentioned that you two were forked when Praiseworthy wanted to explore the ramifications of both instances and sims."
+"I know I've met Praiseworthy, but I don't know much about her. I know Serene built the house and prairie. I think you mentioned that you two were forked when Praiseworthy's up-tree instance wanted to explore the ramifications of both instances and sims."
 
-As it waited for Codrin to piece together what ey could, the fox scraped the bottom of the shake glass for the last spoonful of ice cream and fed it to its partner. A small affection that made the three of them smile.
+As it waited for Codrin to piece together what ey could, the fox scraped the bottom of the shake glass for the last spoonful of ice cream and fed it to its partner. A small affection that made em smile.
 
 "Can you give me a bit of a hint about Serene?"
 
@@ -146,9 +146,9 @@ Dear urged em on with a little twirl of its spoon, looking pleased at the respon
 
 "Too narrow, hmm..." Ey frowned. "Was she...did she come up with propaganda?"
 
-Dear laughed, reached a finger into the shake glass to swipe up a little bit of sticky vanilla, and dabbed it on Codrin's nose. *"Well reasoned. Praiseworthy was the propagandist among the first lines."*
+Dear laughed, reached a finger into the shake glass to swipe up a little bit of sticky vanilla shake, and dabbed it on Codrin's nose. *"Well reasoned. Praiseworthy was the propagandist among the first lines."*
 
-Codrin rubbed at eir nose to get the melted ice cream off before it congealed into a sticky mess. "What exactly goes into being a propagandist, when the role of the Council was to guide but not to govern?"
+Codrin rubbed at eir nose to get the melted ice cream off before it congealed further. "What exactly goes into being a propagandist, when the role of the Council was to guide but not to govern?"
 
 Without falling, the fox's happy expression somehow became a fraction less earnest, just that much less directed.