update from sparkleup

writing/post-self/mitzvot/014.md

@@ -36,7 +36,7 @@ Her cry must have been nearing its end before she arrived, as she'd settled down
 
 "Can you drink, May Then My Name?" he said gently.
 
-She nodded and accepted the mug with both paws to hold it steady, taking a few unsteady laps of the water before simply clutching it to her chest. "Thank you," she croaked, freeing up a paw to accept the damp rag to wipe her face. "I am sorry for so dramatic an entrance."
+She nodded and accepted the mug with both paws to hold it steady, taking a few unsteady laps of the water before simply clutching it to her chest. "Thank you," she croaked, freeing up a paw to use the damp rag to wipe her face. "I am sorry for so dramatic an entrance."
 
 "Hush. You are fine," End Waking said. "Everything sounded quite dramatic indeed. Please take your time, and we can discuss it later."
 
@@ -168,7 +168,7 @@ The skunk sat up straighter. "So you have hinted, yes. Why, though? Why would yo
 
 "E.W.," Debarre murmured. "Cool it."
 
-He tugged his hood down lower over his head and stayed silent for several minutes. "I am sorry, May Then My Name. I did not mean to yell. It is just that I worked hard at getting where I am now, and if she is to feel any --- *any* --- remorse about what she has done with her life, I would like for her to come by it honestly, and if she does not, then I would like her to face the consequences of her actions."
+He tugged his hood down lower over his head and stayed silent for several seconds. "I am sorry, May Then My Name. I did not mean to yell. It is just that I worked hard at getting where I am now, and if she is to feel any --- *any* --- remorse about what she has done with her life, I would like for her to come by it honestly, and if she does not, then I would like her to face the consequences of her actions."
 
 "I do at least understand that," May Then My Name said cautiously. She had shied away from her cocladist at the force of his words, but the apology and explanation drew her back. "You do not need to answer now, or ever for that matter, but is it something you would at least consider?"
 
@@ -188,7 +188,7 @@ Debarre grinned. "Excellent."
 
 End Waking smirked. "Would ey take my name, then?"
 
-"No, we would have to give em a similarly Odist name. Some shitty line of poetry, a few nonsense words smashed together. Gentle Confusion or something."
+"No, we would have to give em a similarly Odist name. Some silly line of poetry, a few nonsense words smashed together. Gentle Confusion or something."
 
 They laughed.
 

writing/post-self/mitzvot/016.md

@@ -32,11 +32,11 @@ After a pause to will it so, ey nodded. "Sure, should be good now."
 
 Ey felt strange staring out into the yard --- the opposite direction of the kitchen --- while True Name cooked, so ey grabbed a notebook and moved to the dining table where, should ey be able to pull eir thoughts together, ey could write, and if ey couldn't, ey could at least talk with the skunk without twisting around in eir seat.
 
-Ey could not, it turned out. Ey flopped the notebook shut again and rubbed at eir face. "What're you cooking?"
+Ey could not, it turned out. Ey flopped the notebook shut again and leaned back in eir chair. "What're you cooking?"
 
 "Chicken...rice...stuff. It is college food."
 
-Ey laughed. "Right, I'm familiar. Sounds good. Certainly cold enough out there for it."
+Ey laughed. "Right, I'm familiar. Sounds good. Certainly cold enough out there."
 
 "Of course, yes. May Then My Name would have the same recipe, would she not?" The skunk clattered about for a few more minutes, and then, apparently satisfied, leaned back on the counter behind the stove. "I do not understand your affection for the weather, but I am happy to make warm things while it is about."
 

writing/post-self/mitzvot/017.md

@@ -54,7 +54,7 @@ May nodded.
 
 They stayed quiet until they worked their way under the covers again, cozying up for sleep, when May murmured, "I have to believe that she is a good person, or at least capable of being one. For my sake, I have to at least try to believe that."
 
-Ey kissed the back of her ears and shushed her to sleep.
+Ey kissed the backs of her ears and shushed her to sleep.
 
 What kept coming back again and again was the feeling of just how small this project felt --- if ey'd been assigned to it as amanuensis, might as well call it what it was. There were so few people involved. True Name and Jonas, then em, May, and End Waking on the periphery. Five people, three clades. It was intimate, in that sense. True Name and Jonas were larger-than-life most of the time, but having been forced into sharing space with her, ey was far more able to see the True Name of today as just someone caught up in a storm and Jonas as the force behind that storm.