<li>“The tree, <em>a jack pine,</em> sloughed the snow from its branches as if it was waking up.”<ul>
<li>uses language to imbue additional characteristics </li>
<li>using simile for personification/interiority</li>
</ul>
</li>
<li>“In awe of the jack pine, I didnot believe it until I saw it, <em>the bird’s nest hidden in its needled, benevolent arms.</em>“<ul>
<li>Above: say writing about religion, using metaphor of benevolence of trees</li>
<li>Restrictive and non-restrictive appositives:<ul>
<li>Restrictives necessary for sentence to function (e.g: including a name with a common noun)</li>
<li>Non-restrictive provide additional information, usually a separate clause (still imbues meaning or adds texture)</li>
<li>Cumulative layering: adding more non-restrictive appositives</li>
<li>Dependent clauses usually appositives, but may not add additional information, unlike appositives</li>
</ul>
</li>
<li>A cumulative sentence is known as a loose sentence that starts with independent clause, then adds subordinate elements or modifiers after subject and predicate</li>
<li>Useful for putting the main idea first, then expand</li>
<li>Example of interiority, gives inner life of the witness (writer as witness)</li>
<li>Adds to informality, connection</li>
<li>70% of sentences are cumulative</li>
<li>Variety to mix up rhythm of sentence (identify sustained rhythms as places to break)</li>
<li>Not really in dialogue, more for mood and scene-setting</li>
<li>Restraint: don’t need to layer <em>every</em> noun, just use to propel the plot or the readers</li>
<li>How much is intuitive vs deliberate? — Deliberate mostly in revision, intuitive in writing. In revision, can force it into consciousness</li>
<li>Are there styles that work better in certain genres, or are they genre agnostic? —<em>Can</em> span genres, but depends on authorial intent (e.g: minimalism, focus on plot, etc). Be strategic, be careful (e.g: if you have two compound sentences, consider a simple sentence). Use tension to speak about bigger/vaguer/more fluid things. Use tension to avoid didactic writing.</li>
<li>cyborgs as uplifted broken things vs this poem as uplifted low art</li>
<li>playing with gender (if cyborg is female, protagonist is male and falls in love)</li>
<li>cyborg advocates outside the media</li>
<li>translation vs not enough information, poetry resists reader</li>
<li>cyborg as metaphor for other where we fail to do the understanding</li>
</ul>
</li>
<li>Discussion on It’s all fun and games until someone gains consciousness:<ul>
<li>dividers are close comments</li>
<li>Poems would be compiler errors</li>
<li>Is this deliberate? Would an AI laugh if it looked at its code and saw this instead?</li>
<li>Maybe gaining consciousness is some happy event</li>
</ul>
</li>
<li>Comparison of other poems:<ul>
<li>cyborg as reality rather than metaphor in Weise’s work (the poet is the cyborg rather than an ally or outsider)</li>
<li>someone on the outside speaking of the cyborg as ‘it’ vs the mind as ‘she’, impersonal, how do authorities view cyborgs? The concept of the ‘less dead’, at what point does it become important?</li>
<li>balancing humanity in cyborg while denying it in order to have an ‘other’</li>
<li>cyborgs as lived reality, but scifi occasionally warning</li>
</ul>
</li>
<li>Married<ul>
<li>From collection <em>Upgraded</em> 2014</li>
<li>Cyborg less about hardware, but the experience of replacement/loss</li>
<li>Teeth (mouth) as intimate area</li>
<li>Narrator keeps talking about ghost, but is there death?</li>
<li>Is this about a takeover? Is the end state everyone being sentin? Very personable grey goo scenario</li>
</ul>
</li>
<li>Writing prompt: Take a genre trope (some are listed on the next slide) and twist it. You could do so in terms of tone: Make a conventionally whimsical trope scary, or add some humor to a sinister figure borrowed from horror fiction. Or you could try to subvert expectations through setting, structure, POV, or another element of craft. You could even take the approach of Franny Choi in “Chi” and create something that talks back to your chosen trope as it exists in another text. Whatever trope you’re reimagining should be evident from the opening lines of your piece, which could take the form of a story or a poem. </li>
