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<ul>
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<li class="done1"> <a href="saint.html">Saint, Heresiarch</a> (Medieval anthology)</li>
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<li class="done1"> <a href="post-self/marsh/index.html">Marsh</a></li>
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<li class="done0"> <a href="florilegium/naming/index.html">Naming</a></li>
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</ul>
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<h2 id="mfa">MFA</h2>
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<ul>
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<li class="done3"> <a href="3/seasons/index.html"><s>Seasons</s> And Flowers Wreathe Your Sleeping Form</a></li>
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<li class="done3"> <a href="3/unknown-things/iyov/index.html">The Elevation of Unknown Things</a></li>
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<li class="done3"> <a href="3/terrifying/index.html">The Margin of the Terrifying</a></li>
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<li class="done0"> <a href="ocww/apply.html">OCWW</a><ul>
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<li class="done0"> <a href="ocww/intro.html">Intro letter</a></li>
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<li class="done2"> [OCWW]y(ocww/apply)<ul>
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<li class="done2"> <a href="ocww/intro.html">Intro letter</a></li>
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</ul>
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</li>
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<li class="done0"> <a href="fcww/index.html">FCWW</a></li>
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<li class="done2"> <a href="fcww/index.html">FCWW</a></li>
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<li class="done2"> <a href="workshop-packet/index.html">Running writing workshops in fandom- and subculture-specific spaces</a></li>
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</ul>
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<h2 id="paused">Paused</h2>
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<li class="done1"> <a href="3/index.html">3</a></li>
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<li class="done1"> <a href="quaker-ephemera/index.html">Quaker ephemera</a></li>
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<li class="done1"> <a href="collab-anthos.html">Collaborative Anthologies</a></li>
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<li class="done2"> Florilegium:<ul>
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<li class="done3"> <a href="3/seasons/index.html"><s>Seasons</s> And Flowers Wreathe Your Sleeping Form</a></li>
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<li class="done3"> <a href="3/unknown-things/iyov/index.html">The Elevation of Unknown Things</a></li>
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<li class="done3"> <a href="3/terrifying/index.html">The Margin of the Terrifying</a></li>
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<li class="done0"> <a href="florilegium/naming/index.html">Naming</a></li>
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</ul>
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</li>
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</ul>
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<h2 id="poetry">Poetry</h2>
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<ul>
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</ul>
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</article>
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<footer>
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<p>Page generated on 2023-11-04</p>
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<p>Page generated on 2023-11-06</p>
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</footer>
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</main>
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<script type="text/javascript">
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@ -81,11 +81,27 @@
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<p>“Do you <em>want</em> to ignore it?”</p>
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<p>“How do you mean?”</p>
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<p>She sat back in her chair, folding her hands over her stomach. “Well, you could continue on as you are, ignoring these concurrences as they arise, or you could act on this new life that you have been given. You could request that we not work so closely together for a while, for instance. This is a perfectly cromulent thing to ask of someone, yes? You have an issue to work through, the issue is spurred by someone’s presence, them not being around would alleviate that stress, hey presto. There is your solution.</p>
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<p>“You could talk about it more, much as we are doing now. That is just as valid an act. If you would like to engage with these memories actively, then there is nothing stopping you from doing so, least of all me.” Her faint smile slipped into a smirk as she added, “Hell, you could ask me on a date, if you wanted, since you already have memories of that going well.”</p>
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<p>“You could talk about it more, much as we are doing now. That is just as valid an act. If you would like to engage with these memories actively, then there is nothing stopping you from doing so, least of all me.” Her faint smile slipped into a smirk as she added, “Hell, you could decide to ask me on a date, if you wanted, since you already have memories of that working out quite well.”</p>
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<p>“Oh my <em>god,</em> love,” Cress said, giggling. “Are you aiming to net the whole clade?” </p>
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<p>She smiled primly. “Would that be so bad? Though I believe I shall pass on Lily.”</p>
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<p>The three of us Marshans laughed.</p>
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<p>“Jokes aside,” she said once we had calmed down, “what I am asking is if ignoring these memories is comfortable for you. I suspect not entirely, or we would not be having this conversation.”</p>
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<p>Put like that, I really did have to sit and think for a moment. I poured myself a cup of tea and watched as the other three settled back into a more mundane conversation. I watched as Dry Grass ladled broth from the hot pot over her bowl of rice to eat it like a soup, watched the way that she talked with her partners, my cocladists, one of whose memories rode shotgun alongside my own.</p>
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<p>I had lived two lives in parallel, Tule’s and mine, and so I let that parallel continue into the future in my own imaginings. One Reed slipped almost effortlessly into a relationship alongside his cocladists, one woman acting as the pivot for our three lives. That Reed sat Hanne down to dredge up the topic of polyamory, untouched these last few years, to discuss this new relationship. That Reed forked to share time where it was required. That Reed grew ever closer to Cress and Tule in this shared orbit around Dry Grass, fell in step with however many others had found themselves mingling with the Ode clade over the more than three centuries they had been alive.</p>
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<p>And the other Reed made the explicit decision to step back. It would have to be explicit, to; I wasn’t sure I could ever keep such a thing from Dry Grass if I wanted, her whole personality seemed to be built around openness. That Reed simply…slipped back into life as it had been. There would be a few awkward meetings here and there sure, but then those memories would fade into comfortable normalcy, as might any dream that sticks with one. Life with Hanne would continue as it was. Life with the clade would be as it had always been.</p>
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<p>Dry Grass had truly left me two forks in the road of equal value. There was no ‘winning’ or ‘losing’, no better or worse. The only path that felt unequal was to continue trying to ignore these feelings. Not just unequal, it felt inaccessible to me. She’d forced the topic out into the open deftly, for better or worse.</p>
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<p>Better, I suspect. She knew the clade well enough to read those signs of discomfort in my words — no great feat; “I can even mostly ignore it” sounded like an equivocation even to me — that she had nudged me toward some more complete understanding by talking it out.</p>
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<p>I — that me who had his own memories and not Tule’s — could certainly see what had drawn my cocladists to her.</p>
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<p>Setting down my tea and reaching forward to snag the ladle in the broth alerted the others to my return to the present. I focused on the task at hand, filling my half-full rice bowl with broth before sitting back once more. “Thanks for talking this through with me,” I said. “I think you’re right, that it’d just be uncomfortable for me to keep trying to ignore it.”</p>
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<p>“Wonderful,” she said, smiling.</p>
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<p>“I don’t have an answer beyond no, I’m not comfortable ignoring all of this, I’m sorry to say.”</p>
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<p>She shook her head. “Nor should you. It has been five minutes and change, Reed.”</p>
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<p>I laughed.</p>
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<p>“Yeah,” Cress said, leaning forward on its elbows. “There’s certainly more than enough going on besides, right? Not like you need to solve <em>every</em> problem.”</p>
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<p>“Ah!” Tule said, sitting up straight and shaking his head. “This is too good a break to be wandering back into talk of whatever it is that we’ve been working on. Let’s stick with making fun of Reed instead, alright?”</p>
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<p>It laughed, holding up its hands. “Alright, I wasn’t going to say anything else, but fair enough.” It turned to me, grinning. “Just enjoy dinner with us, is all I’m saying.”</p>
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<p>“I am,” I replied. “It’s been too long since I’ve had hot pot.”</p>
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<!-- for later, "God, Lily really *would* throw a fit..."-->
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</article>
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<footer>
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<p>Page generated on 2023-11-06</p>
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